Placeholder Text

World Cup 2018/2022

2010-12-02T10:02:00.002-05:00

Seriously, Russia and Qatar? Russia I can kind of see, but Qatar doesn't even have stadiums built yet. This is a load of crap.

Puppy Dog Eyes

2010-12-01T19:32:00.003-05:00

I received the following email from a student last night:

hey,

i have looked all over the website and i cannot find the exam schedule?

help me?

thanks,

student name

I'd like to point out three things:

1) The exam schedule is posted all over campus.

2) Do people just not use capital letters anymore? I mean, I'm her professor and you'd think she would take a more professional approach.

3) The image I see when I read this email is a little dog looking up in the rain with big eyes and a pathetic look on its face, just hoping that someone will take pity on it. (I did have pity on this student and help find the information.)

I think I need to have Plainbellied draw it out so I can post it. If you haven't seen them, her new drawings are AWESOME.

Messing with People

2010-11-30T13:46:00.002-05:00

For this post to make sense, you have to know that I share very little personal information with my students. I'm willing to chat about movies, TV, books, or whatever, but they don't know my son has Down Syndrome, they don't know I'm Mormon (well, most of them don't), and they don't know about my struggles on the job market. I don't think any of that is their business. We're friendly with each other, but they aren't my friends, and I'm not theirs. That's what makes this story fun.

Yesterday, my students asked how my Thanksgiving break had gone. I don't know what possessed me to do it, but I said, "Well, my wife asked for a divorce, so what do you think?" The look of shock and horror on their faces was priceless. I love to mess with people (I enjoy asking people, "Are you calling me fat?" to see their reaction), and this was a good one. After about five seconds of totally hilarious awkwardness, I told them the truth. "I'm messing with you. I had a great weekend." Their sighs of relief were audible across the room.

For the record--my marital bliss has seldom been higher. I love my wife, and I love my children. But I couldn't resist making the joke.

New Goal

2010-11-30T13:40:00.001-05:00

I'm going to post every day. It might just be a funny picture or video, but I'll put something up every day for a while. It helps get the creative juices going.

Turtar Is Back!

2010-11-29T18:09:00.002-05:00

OK, I know what you're thinking: why haven't you posted in over a year and a half Turtar? Well, I've been busy. That's why. Now I'm back. I think the key to all of this is that I realized that I don't really have that much to share with you. Especially since "you" is "no one," because I'm pretty sure no one reads my blog. That's fine. I've got a plan to win new followers. Well, it's not really a plan so much as the fact that I'm going to start writing again. I have a book to get written, and sometimes it helps me to write completely random thoughts in this space. Then my academic writing comes more naturally.

All I have to tell you right now is that yesterday Plainbellied said something funny. We were listening to Christmas music on the way to church, and Ella Fitzgerald started to sing "Rudolph, the Red-Nosed Reindeer." Plainbellied said, "I have a problem with that song. Why does the song begin by asking if we've heard the story of Rudolph with the words 'do you recall the most famous reindeer of all?' If he's so famous, why do they have to ask us that?" So it put me on a quest to find out if the song introduced the legend of Rudolph, or if the story pre-dated the song. It turns out that the story of Rudolph was created for Montgomery Ward department stores in 1939 as part of an advertising campaign. The song was recorded in 1949. So there you have it: Rudolph is a fake.

I could tell you other funny things Plainbellied said in the conversation, but then I'd have to shoot you in the face.

More Plasma Fun!

2009-04-14T15:38:00.002-05:00

Yesterday I went to sell my fluids again. Turns out that one of the other sellers (who looks like Eddie George), thinks I look like this guy, Arn Anderson of the Four Horsemen wrestling group. Those who know me can decide for themselves if it fits.

It's been interesting at the plasma center lately, because the it's under new ownership and is getting ready to move. In the meantime, they are implementing more and more new rules, both for the staff (who are increasingly disgruntled) and the donors (getting increasingly baffled by the labyrinthine system we have to go through to make a few dollars). One of those rules is a change to the "no sleeping" rule. For medical reasons, we aren't allowed to fall asleep while donating. It makes sense, and I'm never that tired while I donate anyway. Well, the new rule is that if you fall asleep, they will shut off your machine and send you away with only a partial payment. Before, they would just yell (nicely) at you until you woke up. A lot of people go give plasma on their way home from a night shift, so I've seen a few people get woken up in the past.

Well, yesterday one of the other patients was shut off and sent away (also banned from donating plasma for a week). I felt bad for her, because she really needs the money. I mean, I'm doing this to help make ends meet, but I also have some other options in an emergency. She was very upset. But the plasma people kind of laughed it off. It troubled me. I'm sure they get used to the type of people they work with and eventually numb to their problems, but there's a limit. Anyway, I felt bad, but there wasn't really anything I could do.

Comments From Her Nibs

2009-04-06T13:24:00.003-05:00

Her Nibs has had a lot of good one-liners lately. Last night, we watched America's Funniest Home Videos as a family. After one video, she collapsed into laughter and said, "He got hit right on his penis!" Then this morning, as the family drove me to work (I was running late), she said to The Boy, "Don't worry. I'm not smoking. It's just the pen cap in my mouth." It was fun.

And apparently Her Nibs is set on getting me elected president of the United States. She told this to Plainbellied recently, but hadn't said anything to me until we were getting ready for church last week. I had a tie on and she said, "Daddy, you look like the President!" I can't tell you just how unqualified I would be for that job, but it's nice to know I have some support if I ever decided to apply for that job. But Plainbellied says it would be grounds for divorce. . . .

I Can't Believe This Article

2009-03-13T11:23:00.003-05:00

Today the CNN website posted an article from Parenting Magazine in which a woman talks about using parenting techniques on your spouse. Frankly, it disturbed me. The author seemed to think her husband was a child, when most of her examples made her seem more childish than her husband. In this day and age, we should have figured out that giving respect to our spouse is more effective than treating him/her like an idiot. Plainbellied and I can occasionally get on each other's nerves, but we behave like adults and either express what our problem is civilly or let it go if it isn't important. This article actually made me feel kind of ill.

My Best and Worst Boston Sports Jerseys

2009-02-25T17:36:00.002-05:00

When Dave Dameshek initially announced his list of the best and worst Boston sports jerseys, I was so excited that I spent an hour or so constructing a list to email him my suggestions (as he had requested people do). Well, the email got bounced back to me because his email box was full. So here is my list, along with some commentary.

It was hard to choose the best numbers, since I have a lot of fond memories of Boston sports teams. So I decided to limit myself to two players per team. It made me wonder who were the best players for each team, not just as players, but who were the best for the team. You'll notice some obvious omissions from my honorable mention list, such as Paul Pierce, Ray Allen, Roger Clemens, Pedro Martinez, and Curt Schilling. I'm on the fence about them. I think that Pierce and Allen are great, but I'm not sure how I feel about them in the pantheon of Celtics players, and since my opinion is that Garnett brought the championship, his number is the most important to honor from the three. Schilling is a legend in Boston after the bloody sock game, but his off-field ramblings are kind of annoying. Pedro always had a kind of weird relationship with Boston, and Clemens, while a great player (and clean) in Boston, has turned into the poster child for what is wrong with baseball, so I wouldn't ever buy his shirt, but I don't think he fits in the "worst" category, so I left him off completely.

Best Jerseys

1. Larry Bird #33--I was torn about whether to put Bird or Russell first. I flipped a coin. The Celtics are definitely the best sports franchise in Boston (and the NBA), so they go first on my list.
2. Bill Russell #6--Greatest winner in NBA history (Jordan was the greatest player, Russell was the greatest winner). He and Bird, along with Red Auerbach, absolutely define Celtics basketball.
3. Carl Yastrzemski #8--I think Yaz is great. In a few years this list might look different when some of the World Series players retire, but for now it's Yaz.
4. Ted Williams #9--Last MLB player to hit over .400. There's no more to say.
5. Bobby Orr #4--The key to the Bruins' Stanley Cup victories in the early '70s.
6. Ray Bourque #77--#7 would be all right, but he switched numbers out of respect for Phil Esposito in 1995. He should have won the Stanley Cup in Boston, and no one blames him for finally leaving the city after bad management screwed up his chances of ever winning the cup there.
7. Tom Brady #12--This is the only active player on this list. The reason? He (and Bill Belichick) won the Super Bowl three times. I think that ought to count for something.
8. John Hannah #73--This was tough, but I picked Hannah over Andre Tippett. I have more memories of Tippett, but Hannah is a near-legend in New England.
9. Doug Flutie #22--His Hail Mary pass to win at Miami in the Orange Bowl has assured his Boston sports glory forever.
10. Mike Eruzione Team USA #21--How could I neglect the BU hockey player whose goal lifted the US national hockey team over Russia in the 1980 Olympics?

Honorable Mention

You'll notice a lot of Celtics players here. Well, if you're the best, you likely have a lot of good players. I've made comments about a few of them.

Kevin McHale #32
Robert Parish #00
Kevin Garnett #5 (Yes, he's an active player, but he was the reason, more than anyone else, that the Celtics won the title last year.)
John Havlicek #17
Bob Cousy #14
Tommy Heinsohn #15 (although his recent announcing history might disqualify him)
Dave Cowens #18
Reggie Lewis #35 (RIP)
Gerry Cheevers #30 (Best Goalie Mask Ever!!!)
Phil Esposito #7
Eddie Shore #2
Tedy Bruschi #54
Andre Tippett #56
Jim Rice #14 (Finally made the Hall!!!)
Carlton Fisk #27

Worst Jerseys

For my worst numbers to have, I decided to focus on notorious players, like Bill Buckner, and players that I feel "stabbed Boston in the back" by leaving for money elsewhere. Some, notably Celtics players from the 1990s, just suck or pissed me off somehow (Antoine Walker). I didn't bother to look up a lot of the numbers, and frankly couldn't be bothered to. These guys are losers.

1. Bill Buckner (for obvious reasons)
2. Tony Eason (also should be obvious)
3. Johnny Damon (sleazeball traitor)
4. Manny Ramirez (I thought long and hard about this one. He was a key on the championship teams, but his departure was so despicable, I've got him here for now. He might get rehabilitated some day)
5. Antoine Walker (The next four names are guys the Celtics drafted during their "dark ages.")
6. Acie Earl
7. Eric Montross
8. Michael Smith
9. Drew Bledsoe (best remembered as the guy benched in favor of Tom Brady)
10. Adam Vinatieri (stabbed the city in the back after it had been good to him)

Boston Sports Jerseys

2009-02-25T16:19:00.002-05:00

One of the ESPN.com writers (Dave Dameshek) has started to write lists of the best (and worst) sports jerseys to buy for a given city. So far, he has done Pittsburgh, Los Angeles, and, most recently, Boston. I thought I would give my critique here.

I'm not very enthused by Dameshek's list, because I think he got too "cute" with his selections. He also has only seven people on the list. I don't think you can limit it to seven in Boston (unless you limit the number of Red Sox and Bruins jerseys). Anyway, here are my comments on his specific choices (I'm going to gloss over some of them).

Best Jerseys

1. Bobby Orr--Definitely should be included. Number 1? Probably not, unless you're a hockey fan.
2. Larry Bird--Another good choice, but I think it should be a game jersey, since the warm-up jackets from that era are kind of ugly.
3. Fred Lynn/Gabe Kapler/Josh Beckett--Seriously? While Lynn and Beckett are admittedly good players, I'm a little stunned that Dameshek would put them ahead of Yaz, Ted Williams, Jim Rice, David Ortiz or even Oil Can Boyd.
4. Tom Brady--I don't think we can argue about this one either. While I think the list should focus on players who have retired, Brady is one of two people most responsible for New England's Super Bowl success in the past decade (the other is Bill Belichick).
5. Mark Henderson--This is just stupid. Henderson is the guy who used a snowplow to clear a spot on the field to help the Patriots' kicker in 1982. He doesn't count as a player, and should absolutely be stricken from this list.
6. Doug Flutie--Absolutely.
7. Derek Sanderson--No and no. He might have been a character, but you're going to tell me he should be on this list ahead of Ray Bourque, Phil Esposito and Gerry Cheevers? Not to mention players from other sports. I'm absolutely flabbergasted that there are more Bruins players on this list than Celtics.

Honorable Mention

I'm not sure what to say about this. I just don't like it when he cops out saying, "Any member of '60s or '80s Celtics (except Greg Kite)" and things like that. He never mentions Bill Russell or John Havlicek by name. This is an absolute travesty.

Worst Jerseys

1. Johnny Damon--Definitely should be on this list for the way he stabbed Boston in the back. Should he be top of the list? Probably not.
2. Roger Clemens--I'm torn about this. I don't like Clemens, and he was a jerk in Boston, but he was likely clean while he was there, and he was a great player. Most of his really terrible problems have been since he left there. I would leave him off the list altogether.
3. Bob Stanley--This is dumb. We all know Bill Buckner screwed up. There's no reason to try rehabilitating him by shifting blame to Bob Stanley. I was watching that game. Buckner is the goat.
4. Rick Pitino--Again, this isn't a player, but Pitino certainly needs to be reviled in Boston.
5. Tony Eason--Agreed.
6. Eric Mangini--Another coach. Did Dameshek have trouble coming up with players?
7. Gold Alternate Bruins--Not my favorite jersey, but worst? Probably not.

Coming up next. . . my own list of best and worst jerseys.

Today at Plasma

2009-02-25T16:03:00.005-05:00

I got in and out of the plasma center relatively quickly today. There is a guy who has been doing it for years who told me some of his "secrets" for giving blood more quickly (he does things I'm not willing to do to my body for a measly check--maybe for a really large check. . .), and he was there today. Well, he was "deferred." When someone is "deferred," it means that they can't give plasma that day. When I finally made it through screening and went to the back, one of the otehr guys who had been in the waiting room with me shouted across the donor floor to ask, "What happened to Sylvester?" He was looking at me, and I realized at that moment that I now belong to the plasma subculture. It's an odd feeling. I don't necessarily want to belong to this subculture, but there I am, with a regular schedule and "colleagues." I am a purveyor of hidden knowledge, and I have been accepted as one of their own. Maybe I should approach it like an anthropologist. Nah.

First Plasma Post

2009-02-23T14:56:00.004-05:00

The plasma center where I sell my blood has specialty plasma programs, in which they innoculate you for some disease (Hepatitis, Rabies, Anthrax), and I found out today that I qualify for one. I think it would be cool to say, "I'm vaccinated against Rabies," but the financial benefits of the program are not enough to make it worthwhile, especially since I'll likely only keep doing this until May if I can help it.

There are weird people at the center. Most of the people I meet come from a very different world than I do, and they talk about how to game the system all the time. Some of them claim to know people who pay the rent with their plasma earnings (trust me, they must be living in squalor based on how much they pay us). Others get rejected for having a high pulse (over 100 will get you turned away--how do you have a resting pulse that high?). One guy gets in and out in about 30 minutes. I asked him how he did it, and he told me he takes aspirin regularly (several pills a day) to thin is blood out, and the two days before his day to donate, he drinks lots of water and gatorade ("It replaces electrolytes"). Then he told me I owed him a bag of pork rinds as payment for his secrets. There are other guys who race each other to see who can finish faster. I spent my first few weeks trying to get things faster. One day I finished in 37 minutes, but usually it takes me around 50. So I started drinking lots of water. I tried taking aspirin the night before one donation. None of it helped. I tend to finish in 45-55 minutes no matter what. So I've given up trying. It isn't worth the effort to shave 20 minutes off my donation time. Other things are more important.

This is a business. I spend an hour waiting before it's my turn, regardless of how full the center is. They have arcane rules like, "If you step out the door, you go to the end of the line." But in the waiting room you get to listen to loudmouths brag about how quickly they finish. Then you think, "Do I really need to be here?" Unfortunately, the answer is still yes.

I'm on a Roll

2009-02-15T23:22:00.002-05:00

While I'm at it, I think I'll write a little more this evening. I have a few things I would like to share. We've been trying to come up with new parenting strategies for dealing with Her Nibs. She has become a handful--part-time drama queen, full-time pain (not really, but you get the idea). It seems as though when she is awake, she is never off or on standby. She needs to be engaged every second of every day. If I'm around, she's constantly talking to me, and I've found myself telling her that I just need some time to myself more and more often. Well, I guess I didn't realize how this would go. A few weeks ago as we drove to church, she was taking to The Boy in the back of the car in a one-sided conversation, and she asked him what game he wanted to play. A moment passed in silence, then she said, "We can't play that game. The alone-time game is just for grown ups. You silly!" I guess I'll have to do things differently.

Secondly, I was asked to teach Sunday School at church. I've secretly always wanted this calling, but it turns out to be a lot harder than I expected. I have some opinions that might be termed "unorthodox," but only in a cultural sense. There are certain things about our religion that are not really points of doctrine, but many people think that they are. So in our very conservative ward, I've had to watch myself, and I've already received one talking to by an old man with no business telling me what I can and can't teach. The bishop knows what I'm teaching, and he has told me that everything is fine, so I'm going to ignore the old man (who looks like a cross between Skeletor and Jabba the Hutt--is that mean to say?) and continue doing what I'm doing. Some weeks are better than others. Today went really well. People were interested, they were making comments, and everyone was respectful of one another. I really felt like I was doing it right today, and I don't get to say that every week.

Thirdly, I thought I would introduce a new topic of discussion: blood plasma. Recently, I've taken to donating blood plasma. Well, selling is a better word. It's O.K. money, and one of the only things I can take on that is flexible and doesn't interfere with my real job. But I meet interesting people, and I've decided to write about my experiences on this blog. Hopefully you'll enjoy it, because I certainly don't on most days.

Introducing The Boy

2009-02-15T23:17:00.003-05:00

One thing I forgot to mention in my Facebook rant is that we have finally come up with a new blog name for our son (formerly Lizard Loaf). He will henceforth be known as "The Boy" in all blog posts that refer to him. So to clarify, that makes my family Turtar (me), Plainbellied (my wife), Her Nibs (our 4-year-old daughter), and The Boy (our 4-month-old son).

Facebook

2009-02-15T23:02:00.004-05:00

So I took the plunge and signed up for Facebook. It's an interesting place where I can be online and not totally anonymous. I wasn't sure how long it would last, but I've been on for over a month now. The impulse initially came when I wondered how people I went to high school with were doing. That impulse has passed, but there are a couple of games I got interested in, so I'm staying. The weirdest part about Facebook is getting in touch with people you haven't seen in decades, who you don't really remember very well, and having them seem really excited to hear from you. So far, I've found out that I ws the first boy a high school friend ever danced with, I got one vote for "class looker" in the senior yearbook, and I'm the third best of my high school friends on Word Twist and Pathwords (someday I'll be on top, though).

The craziest part is that I'm now "friends" on Facebook with one person I really hated. He was a jerk to me, but when his "riend request"came through, I allowed my curiosity to get the better of me, so there we are, friends, linked forever on the Facebook network. Well, at least until I hit the delete key. . .

But that's the problem, I signed up for Facebook knowing full well that erasing your presence from it is nearly impossible. So even though I enjoy the lack of anonymity there, I am terrified of saying or doing something wrong that will come back to bite me. I see some of the things my friends post, and I can't believe they would put it on the internet, which has a habit of remembering things. I'm not involved in anything sinister. There are no incriminating photos, since I haven't done anything sinister, but what if a prospective employer looks me up? What will they think?

Possibly I'm over-reacting. But then again, maybe Facebook is Big Brother.

Why You Shouldn't Watch Romantic Comedies

2008-12-18T09:27:00.003-05:00

The BBC is reporting on a new study that shows fans of romantic comedies have unrealistic expectations when it comes to love. What a surprise—people who watch unrealistic movies have unrealistic expectations.

More than anything, I'm chalking this up as a victory to all the men who don't like these movies. Now when our significant other wants to watch them, we can beg off with the excuse: "But those movies are psychologically unhealthy." Score one for the guys!

Lobster

2008-12-11T20:00:00.004-05:00

We ate lobster today. I really like it, but it's so expensive. The store usually sells it for 16.99/lb. This week, they dropped the price to 6.99/lb. That's still more than we would normally spend on meat or fish, but that's a good price for what it is.

Random note: I just heard Plainbellied upstairs with Her Nibs, who is prepping for bed: "[Muffled sound] wipe! That's gross!" I really don't want to know what happened.

Lobster is one of those things I remember from when I was a kid. I don't eat it very often. I think I've only had it twice in the last ten-fifteen years. Most recently I got a grilled lobster tail with my dinner from Outback Steakhouse. It was dried out and not very good. So when we got our lobster today, I steamed them, and it came out really well.

Her Nibs refused to help prep them--let's face it, lobsters look kind of gross. But when we started eating, she liked it. Plainbellied was another story. She's eaten lobster before, but she's never eaten a lobster by herself. So I taught her how to break it apart and what to eat (I don't touch the tomale, which is wicked disgusting). She did really well, but I noticed that she kept giving her meat to Her Nibs. It turns out that she didn't really like it.

I give her props for trying though. That was impressive.

Musical Mayhem

2008-12-09T17:22:00.002-05:00

I have a lot of CDs. Really. A lot. As in hundreds.

I made my collection largely in high school and college. In fact I haven't purchased more than a few CDs a year since I got married. I don't have the money to support my habit anymore. But now I have a problem. I got an iPod a few years ago, and now I have a lot of music in iTunes so I can put it on my iPod and take it with me. Unfortunately, I haven't taken the time to move all of my CDs. I think this is rooted in the fact that I'm inherently lazy. I have music I like on iTunes, so I don't feel the need to import more. I've increased how much I put on over the years, working on the project intermittently. My iTunes now has 13.3 GB of music in it. That's a lot, but I still have a lot of music to put on it.

Today I'm trying to make a dent of some kind. Each album doesn't take that long to import, though the task is still daunting. Having said that, I'm rediscovering some pretty cool music. I had forgotten about the Lemonheads and Mighty Mighty Bosstones. I haven't listened to Cream's entire Disraeli Gears album for a while. The Cranberries have some really cool music, too. Maybe if I remind myself how fun that part is, it won't be as hard to do next time.

Post-election Roundup

2008-12-09T17:14:00.003-05:00

It's been so long since I've posted that I think I'll just briefly touch on the election. This should be the last election-related post you'll get from me for a long time.

First, I'm happy Barack Obama won. I don't know how he'll do actually governing, but he has a chance to make a significant positive impact. I would not have confidence in John McCain to do that.

I want Sarah Palin to go away. Some people actually see her as a leader of the Republican party? Well, if she gets the nomination in 2012, I won't vote for her. She's a joke.

John McCain was very gracious in defeat. He was definitely more gracious than his followers. At his concession speech he had to tell them to stop booing when he pledged to work with President Obama. I don't know if he's going to be an opposition figure or what, but I do have confidence that we might just get the old John McCain back.

The transition has gone pretty smoothly, all things considered. We're in two wars and a major recession, and yet the wheels keep turning. I'm concerned only about two things. First, the Bush administration is pushing through a bunch of rule changes, and I hope the effort comes up short or the next administration quickly overturns them. They will gut the environmental protections currently in place, and I don't think we can afford that. My second problem with the transition is the appointment of Hillary Clinton. I don't like her. I don't trust her, and I don't want her to be Secretary of State. Having said that, I hope that I'm wrong and she does a good job. I used to think highly of Condoleeza Rice, and look how that turned out.

But that's it for politics. I'm all out of gas after the election. Now I'm concentrating on work and family. That's enough for me.

Absolutely classic!!!!!!

2008-11-01T23:19:00.003-05:00

This just came up on the wire, and I had to put it out there. The Houston Chronicle is reporting that Sarah Palin took a prank call from a French-Canadian comedy duo claiming to be President Sarkozy of France. Here's the audio for your pleasure. Let me just say that I'm worried about someone as gullible as her being in a position of authority. The Houston Chronicle article gives some context for how bad her response really was.

This is funny, too

2008-10-23T15:37:00.001-05:00

I've been meaning to put this up for a while. I think it's really funny.

Old, Grizzled Third-Party Candidate May Steal Support From McCain

You Expect Me To Talk?

2008-10-23T12:58:00.003-05:00

I've been meaning to write this post for about a week now. Last week, when Lizard Loaf was still in the hospital, they did a chest X-ray on him, and it was a pretty crazy situation. They gave Plainbellied and I lead aprons to wear and asked us to hold him down on the table while they took the images. When they turned on the machine, somekind of alignment guide came on, which was a red laser line down the center of his body from head to toe. I know it was just an alignment guide, but we had to pin him down and he was uncomfortable and then this laser came on. Ever since, I've had a scene from Goldfinger in my mind. Today I took the time to find it on Youtube and share it. My favorite exchange comes right at the end of this short clip. I hope you enjoy it.

More Lizard Loaf

2008-10-21T20:34:00.003-05:00

Here's another picture of Lizard Loaf. He's doing well here at home, though the oxygen machine is driving me crazy. It's a constant hum in the background. Hopefully we'll only need it a few more weeks and he can come off it.

Today's Funny Clip

2008-10-21T20:05:00.002-05:00

I found this clip from a John McCain speech today. He's trying to respond to a comment from an Obama supporter who called Western Pennsylvania "racist." As you'll see, McCain mangled it, and I think it's funny.

Home at Last

2008-10-17T12:31:00.002-05:00

Yesterday afternoon, we were able to take Lizard Loaf home from the hospital. Out of all the possible outcomes he could have faced, this was probably the best. It turns out that he is aspirating liquid into his lungs when he eats, which explains the fluid in the lungs, which explains his low oxygen levels, which might explain his body temperature drop and his other problems. He's still on oxygen for now, but we hope that by adjusting his food (thickening it so he doesn't aspirate it), we can resolve the aspiration problem. Now if we can just get the existing fluid out of his lungs. . .

For now, it's good news, and we are happy that our boy can be at home with us, instead of at the hospital hooked up to monitors. More as things progress!

Pro-life and Pro-Obama

2008-10-17T12:15:00.003-05:00

There was an interesting article in today's LA Times by a Catholic Obama supporter. He addressed a lot of my own issues, and I wanted to share the article with you. Basically, he asks whether someone who is pro-life, as I am, can really support Barack Obama. I think he made a good case that yes, you can. I know most of those who read this blog are pro-life, just like me. So it might speak to you in the same way it did to me.

Lizard Loaf Update 2

2008-10-16T00:16:00.005-05:00

Today was a very busy day, and I think I should post some kind of update. Lizard Loaf now has his own team of doctors to look after him. Today he was seen by an ENT, several cardiologists, a pulmonary specialist, and his primary care pediatrician. I'm not sure if there were more, since I had to go to work today and make sure that I got a few things done. I might not have listed them all. We're at a teaching hospital, so each doctor has his own team of interns, residents, and med students as well, so I'm confident that everything possible is being done for our boy. Here's the long and short of it.

There are two distinct issues that they are trying to assess: 1) Lizard Loaf is exhibiting signs of hypothyroidism, which if left untreated can lead to a significant increase in mental retardation. 2) His blood-oxygen level is low, so he is on oxygen and they want to figure out how to help him breath on his own. As frustrating as this entire experience has been, I'm grateful that we have such good doctors around to treat our boy, and I'm confident that we are getting close to some kind of resolution.

Oh, yeah, the other doctor who came was an endocrinologist, who is looking into the thyroid thing. He thinks we should wait a few weeks and retest, since sometimes newborns have a natural abnormality in their hormone levels, and in two weeks we'll have a better sense of what's going on. The levels aren't outrageously off. They're just playing it safe, and I'm happy for that.

The oxygen issue is a bit trickier, since Lizard Loaf has a couple of things going on. First, he has an artery growing across his trachea, and it might be constricting things. Having seen the specialists, we are now confident that this isn't a problem, which is good because it might have required surgery to repair. There is also some possibility that he has a heart problem. When babies are in the whom there are some built-in "shortcuts" for moving blood to the body before the lungs work. One of them is a flap between the two sides of the heart. They did an echocardiogram on the boy after he was born, and while there is no evidence of a "hole in the heart," it looks like the flap hadn't closed up yet, and blood was flowing both ways across the barrier. The long and short of it is that they are going to check his heart again to make sure it has now closed up. Most likely, it will now be fine, and it still won't explain the oxygen problem.

Now then, the most likely candidate at this point is aspirated fluid in his lungs, which got there either during childbirth of from reflux. If it got there during childbirth, then it isn't going to recur most likely, and as soon as we can get the fluid out of his lungs he'll be fine. If it's reflux, then we'll have to treat the reflux with medication and other things until it goes away and there is the outside chance he might need surgery to repair something. I'm not willing to speculate about that.

The long and short of all this is that the likely culprits have been narrowed down significantly, and Lizard Loaf's pediatrician here at the hospital is now starting to feel confident we're getting at the answer. Consequently, he's started to loosen up when we ask about going home. Unless the boy needs the reflux test, we should be headed home tomorrow afternoon after the echocardiogram. I don't want to jinx it, so I'll stop there, but I'm getting secretly excited inside.

Now that you've read through my 1:30 AM musings on Lizard Loaf's health, I'll reward you with a short video of him sucking on his own lips. It's a few days old, but I really like it still. Make sure you have the volume on to appreciate the noises.

Wink-Blink Off

2008-10-16T00:15:00.001-05:00

I think this video is pretty funny. I hope you enjoy it.

Lizard Loaf Update

2008-10-14T05:35:00.002-05:00

Thins have improved significantly overnight. Lizard Loaf just ate 2 ozs., which is six times what he was eating at a time yesterday. He's more awake and alert, able to wake me up with a single cry. He's moving around better as well. I am very happy about this. Now we just need to find out what was wrong to make sure he doesn't end up back here again. He'll be here one more day at least, then we can take him home.

So far I am very happy with the doctors and nurses here. It's now 6:38 AM, and one of the ENT doctors who is going to look at Lizard Loaf's trachea this morning has already come by to check on him. All of the doctors have told us what a worst-case scenario might be, and it's reassuring that they were willing to tell us, even though it won't likely get to that point. If it does, we will have had some warning and will better be able to make informed choices about how to proceed.

Here's hoping he can go home tomorrow.

Lizard Loaf back at the Hospital

2008-10-13T21:09:00.003-05:00

This morning, Plainbellied was feeding Lizard Loaf and thought he felt cold, so she took his temperature. It was low, and the doctor said we should take him to the emergency room. This was 4:00 in the morning. When we got to the hospital, someone met us at the door, and he was whisked into the back while I signed him in. In the back, they put him under a warmer and ordered blood tests, and it came back that he was dehydrated. They also took a spinal tap and admitted our little boy to the hospital for 48 hours while they grew cultures to rule out infection. It's definitely an overwhelming feeling, but I feel confident that the doctors will do their best to make sure he is healthy.

Most of you know that Lizard Loaf has Down syndrome, and that can bring its own challenges. We thought we had gotten past them when his echocardiogram came back negative for holes in his heart, but to return to the hospital just days after we had brought him home was a reality check. We're in this for the long haul.

So what's the good news? Well, at 9:00 Lizard Loaf ate three times as much as he had eaten at any other feeding. That's a good sign, as is the fact that his temperature is up. I think he might have turned the corner. He'll still be here a couple of days, but I feel much more confident that he will pull out of this and get better.

Stay tuned. I'll update as things develop. Sorry if this post is a bit disjointed, but I haven't had much sleep today.

Lizard Loaf Is Here

2008-10-13T20:48:00.003-05:00

Last Thursday at 12:19 PM, we welcomed Codename: Lizard Loaf Popo Buns to our family. We've decided that he needs a new name, so I've been tasked with choosing it. It's late and I haven't got the brains to make such an important decision tonight, so you'll have to wait until another time for the actual name. For now I'll keep using Lizard Loaf, but stay tuned to learn his new codename.

The Fear Factor

2008-10-07T10:52:00.003-05:00

I'm not surprised that the presidential campaign has taken a decidedly negative turn in the past few days. This has a lot to do with the economy. I think my father put it best when he said that the economy is "going sideways." There is no clear direction for the financial system of our country. While I believe the bailout was necessary to protect the investments of Americans, there is a lot more that needs to happen. If the polls are to be believed, many more people trust Barack Obama to fix the economy than trust John McCain, whose primary financial advisor, Phil Gramm, said that the recession was all in our minds.

Because more Americans trust Barack Obama on this point, the McCain campaign is desperate to change the subject. So they have given new life to long-discredited attacks on Obama's character because of his associations with Bill Ayers, a former member of the Weather Underground, and Reverend Jeremiah Wright. In response, Obama has mentioned McCain's association with Charles Keating, an instrumental part of the savings and loan failure in the late 1980s and a man who was sentenced to prison time for committing fraud. The interesting thing to me is that McCain said months ago, when Hillary Clinton tried this tactic (or is it a strategy?) on Obama in the primaries, that he would never engage in this kind of campaigning. Well, he's doing it now. And it is shameful. McCain is solely to blame for this negative turn.

There is a difference in their attacks. Obama's attacks have a foundation in reality. McCain really was admonished by the Senate for his role in the Keating scandal. It really does reflect directly on his character. Obama had nothing to do with Ayers's violent past, and his pastor's sermons have been taken wildly out of context. More than anything else, Obama has been attacking McCain for running a negative campaign. I think this is relevant because it points out McCain's hypocrisy and his lack of original ideas for solving our financial dilemma. Hopefully, McCain's poll numbers will continue to plummet and he will realize that the only way to save his legacy will be to stop attacking and return to an honorable campaign.

But it gets worse. Sarah Palin is using this garbage in her stump speech and inciting radicals in the crowd. It is now public knowledge that her rally in Clearwater, Florida attracted a bunch of racists who hurled epithets at black camera crews and one audience member yelled that they should kill Obama. Audience members at McCain's rallies are calling Obama a terrorist. This is just wrong. I know some of my readers support McCain, and I think you need to ask yourselves: do I really support a man who is inciting violence against his opponent?

Found this

2008-10-03T17:19:00.003-05:00

I found this on Salon.com today. I think it sums up Sarah Palin's debating style very well. :)

This is pretty good, too.

VP Debate

2008-10-03T08:11:00.003-05:00

Last night's debate was a little surreal. The expectations for Sarah Palin were set so low that anything better than a complete meltdown would have been hailed as a success. Everyone was talking about how Joe Biden has a tendency to put his foot in his mouth and waited for him to say something stupid. In the end, however, I think we got a really good sense about which of them was prepared to be Vice President. I'll give you a hint: it wasn't Sarah Palin.

Probably the most aggravating part about it was the Palin steadfastly refused to answer the questions posed to her. Essentially, she took every question and brought it back to her predetermined talking points. It troubles me that we are one month from the election, and we still have not had clear answers from her on a range of important issues. Her ridiculous attempt to portray the media as "out to get her" got even worse last night. Let me put it this way: we already have a "Joe six-pack" in the White House, and he's done a terrible job. Do we really want Sarah Six-Pack anywhere near the Oval Office?

I think Biden did a tremendous job overall. I've been trying to learn more about him lately, and I have found myself liking him more and more. Yes, he can say some ridiculous things, but he is a genuinely thoughtful and caring person. I didn't know he was a widower, and when he brought that up, I thought he did so in a careful and respectful way, not the way John McCain keeps making a fool of himself by constantly talking about his experience as a POW.

The one thing I will say about Biden is that I wish he had called Palin out more. For example, when she called the US commander in Afghanistan by the wrong name. Or when she talked about reducing taxes in Alaska, when she in fact raised taxes in Wasilla to pay for a sports arena that is still losing money years later. Or when she cited Al Qaeda . . . AL QAEDA! . . . as her source for saying that the primary front in the war on terror is in Iraq. And I wish he had pointed out more forcefully that she was not answering the questions--questions that we need to have answered.

My favorite parts of the debate: when Palin used Al Qaeda as her source, when Biden challenged Palin to explain how a McCain administration would differ from the Bush administration, and when Biden gave his vision of the office of Vice President while Palin aligned herself with Dick Cheney. And who will ever forget Sarah Palin blaming climate change for affecting the activities of humans (she clearly got that backward). Palin did nothing to distinguish herself last night other than not completely falling apart. She added nothing substantive to the debate.

Overall, I think that the debate was a study in contrast between Joe Biden, who knew what he was talking about, and Sarah Palin, who once again demonstrated that she has no knowledge about some of the key issues facing our nation beyond some sycophantic talking points. The fact that Palin avoided a meltdown did nothing to dispel my doubts about her. The New York Times gave an excellent editorial on this today, and I agree with it wholeheartedly.

New on Youtube

2008-10-01T22:43:00.001-05:00

Not only is Sarah Palin a totally unqualified candidate for Vice President, but she's also a pretty terrible flute player. Here's proof from the talent competition in the 1984 Miss Alaska competition.

Great Fun

2008-09-30T18:43:00.000-05:00

I loved this.

Obama Runs Constructive Criticism Ad Against McCain

Wall Street "Bailout"

2008-09-30T10:14:00.002-05:00

Much has been said about the potential government bailout of Wall Street investment companies who made bad decisions on purchasing mortgage securities. It has been called the worst financial crisis since the Great Depression. I'm not an economist, but I have looked at what has been going on, and I have a few comments I would like to make. Let me be clear: I support the government's efforts to apply a short-term band-aid to the banking industry and keep it from failing if adequate safeguards are put into place on issues like executive compensation and oversight. Not to do this could potentially lead to disastrous financial consequences that affect not just rich investors, but everyone who has a retirement plan.

First of all, the root causes of this crisis are obvious, and there is no need for John McCain's "9/11 Commission"-type investigation. The Bush administration and Republican-led Congress loosened the rules for mortgage lenders and other types of investments, which made it easier for more people to qualify for mortgages, regardless of their ability to pay them back. This artificially inflated the value of homes, creating a "bubble" effect. It took a few years, but the market finally slowed down when people realized that they could no longer pay their mortgages. In many cases, these people got their mortgages based on bad information. they assumed (with some reason) that home values would continue to rise at a consistent rate. In other cases, the mortgage companies engaged in fraudulent practices like increasing the stated income of an applicant so that he/she could qualify for a larger loan. They began the practice of interest-only loans, no-money-down home purchases, and other risky type loans that would eventually come back to haunt people when the amount due suddenly increased to the point where they could no longer afford it. Now the banks that made those loans are looking for a handout from the government.

But the problem does not stop there. Those mortgages were "bundled" and sold as investments to other firms, many of which take care of retirement funds. Now that many people are no longer able to pay the loans back, the banks have significantly reduced operating capital, which is leading to a "credit freeze." While I am as opposed to excessive credit as the next guy (still paying for school), I have to say that the credit markets are what make business, and therefore growth, possible. Some of Wall Street's largest firms have already collapsed, beginning with Freddie Mac and Fannie Mae, giant mortgage lenders, Lehman Brothers, one of the oldest investment banks in America, and AIG, an insurance giant (thank goodness I didn't hand them my retirement last month). Washington Mutual, a bank, failed as well in the largest bank failure we've ever seen.

Scary things are happening, so what do we do? In the Great Depression, there were two approaches, that of Herbert Hoover, a fiscal conservative, and Franklin Delano Roosevelt, who was more of Keynesian. Hoover, by allowing the markets to "correct themselves," actually triggered an even worse fall than would have occurred had some safeguards been in place to shore up troubled banks and investment groups. Roosevelt undertook a massive restructuring of the economy, in which government took a role in insuring bank deposits and other measures to promote confidence in the markets. While the country did not truly come out of the Depression until World War II led to a massive increase in productivity, the reforms created by Roosevelt (as much as I hate to admit it) have kept our country from having any total meltdowns on the same scale. In case you did not know, financial meltdowns were common before increased regulation, with at least two major Panics (Depressions) in the 1800s. While we have faced numerous "recessions" since 1940, none have come close to the problems of the 1930s or the 1800s.

The Reagan years and the Bush years have been times of de-regulation of the markets, with troubling consequences. First came the Savings and Loan scandals during the late 1980s, in which John McCain played a prominent part as a member of the Keating Five, a group of Senators who received money from a Savings and Loan owner. They tried to keep federal regulators from investigating Keating and were ultimately reprimanded by the Senate Ethics Committee. Next came the Bush years, during which John McCain was a champion of the de-regulation efforts that led directly to this crisis.

Allowing the market to correct itself is a good idea in theory, but the problem in this is that the federal government was complicit in the de-regulation of these industries and therefore at least somewhat culpable for the fact that many peoples' retirements are at risk. Sweden went through a similar crisis in the early 1990s and used a similar plan to help reform the banking system. They made their money back relatively quickly. I think our country should do the same.

So where do we go from here? I'm not one of those who thinks that any plan is a good plan. I think there needs to be a prudent injection of capital into the credit markets to keep things going. Having looked at the draft bill that was rejected yesterday, I was struck by the fact that they had taken the initial administration proposal and added significant modifications to it, including the creation of an oversight board, limitations on executive compensation, and a decision to dole the money out slowly, rather than all at once. It's not a perfect plan, but it is a good plan, and it is a necessary plan. I am appalled that the "maverick," John McCain, decided to insert himself into the negotiations for political gain, apparently derailing an agreement in principle. The bailout plan is necessary to protect the life savings of working Americans, and provisions were put in place to limit the abuse of funds in granting "golden parachutes."

I don't know what will happen, but I hope a resolution is reached soon.

Palin the Debater and Interviewee.

2008-09-29T15:01:00.004-05:00

If you are interested in knowing what Sarah Palin is like as a debater, here is a short clip from one of the debates she had when running for governor of Alaska. Keep in mind that the debate format used then was different than what she will face on Thursday, because there are only two candidates this time (which will force her to give longer, more expansive answers). I'm curious as to how it will work out this week. I hope that Joe Biden 1) has no mercy and 2) doesn't say anything stupid. If he can stay gaffe-free, I think he'll win, especially given Palin's recent Katie Couric interview, which I've added below the debate video.

Post-debate Impressions

2008-09-27T17:03:00.005-05:00

Plainbellied beat me to it again, but I still have to post my thoughts on Friday's presidential debate. We don't have cable, so we watched the debate on the computer through the NY Times webcast. I think next time we'll do CBS, which we could expand to full-screen. So here's what I think: If John McCain wants to paint Barack Obama as inexperienced and naive, he'll have to try much harder. I agree whole-heartedly with Plainbellied's assessment of the debate so I won't belabor the point, but even on foreign policy, I felt that Obama came across as more informed and especially more reasonable. He wants to change our approach to foreign policy to include more room for diplomacy, without resorting so quickly to military action.

While McCain tried to wow the audience with a travelogue of all the trouble spots he has visited, he did nothing to convince me that he actually understood the realities of our world. By refusing to speak with our enemies until they meet vaguely defined "preconditions," I believe that McCain's approach might actually induce them to work harder to obtain nuclear weapons. And what the heck was he talking about when he was saying that "The average South Korean is 3 inches taller than the average North Korean, a huge gulag." This hardly seemed relevant to the issue of American responses to North Korean sabre-rattling.

McCain was even more out of his depth when discussing the economy. His much touted plan to "freeze spending" on everything but defense, veterans benefits (which he has opposed in the past), and entitlements is entirely wrongheaded. The worst thing for the government to do in the event of a recession is to stop spending. In fact, it was spending that brought the country out of the Great Depression. Obama, while recognizing that he won't be able to do everything he wants right away, has a well-conceived notion of how our economy works, and his argument that trimming the budget requires a scalpel rather than a hachet rings true. John McCain's ranting about earmarks will only resolve so much, and a spending freeze would have disastrous consequences. Who do you trust on the economy?

In addition to the substantive differences between the candidates, their style was markedly difference. I am admittedly basing my vote in this election partly on personality, and I will take the guy with an even temper over the guy who seems to be trying to teach some whippersnapper a lesson. He needs to understand that being a "maverick" can only take him so far. Obama, on the other hand, was much more poised and calm throughout the debate. He certainly came off as more "presidential" and less "crotchety."

For a factcheck on some of the claims bandied about at the debate, Factcheck.org has a pretty good summary.

Palin At It Again

2008-09-23T14:12:00.003-05:00

This story broke today. Apparently the McCain campaign wanted to keep the press away from Sarah Palin's meetings with foreign leaders. But CNN finally grew a backbone and told them to give access or there would be no coverage.

It got me thinking about an alarming trend in this election: the Republicans have tried to bury Palin and keep her away from the press. I'm not sure why that is, but if I had to guess, I would assume that they know how incredibly unqualified she is and worry that she would say something totally ridiculous. John McCain himself is about to give his first press conference in three weeks. I give him a bit of a pass because he has appeared on several television programs and taken questions. He also has a track record in national politics that we can use to assess him, though he has become increasingly inconsistent and has started refusing to speak with the press (a troubling sign). Sarah Palin's national record includes an interview with Charles Gibson, who let her get away without answering any questions with any kind of substance, and with some guy on Fox News, who structured his questions in such a way that she could speak in vague platitudes (I did watch some of this). When will the media play "stump the candidate" with Palin? They've done it with McCain and with Obama and with Biden. Why does Palin get a pass?

I read this comment on a news website today, and it troubles me:

Why should Palin grant those lying b*****ds any time at all? I refer to the Charlie Gibson "attempted murder" interview. He didn't want to interview her--he wanted to destroy her.

Screw the media.

Let Sarah Palin do her thing.

This is an incredibly dangerous point of view. If we just "let her do her thing," that means allowing her to use private email to conduct government business in an attempt to hide from open records laws. It means allowing her to continue asserting that she turned down government money for the "bridge to nowhere" when in fact she only killed it after Congress had removed the earmark and made it a national embarrassment. We need to know why she needed so much federal money (our money) for Alaska when Alaskans have no state income or sales tax, and in fact were given 2000 dollars each last year as a bonus--money she could have used instead of federal money (possibly 80 million dollars). If the media doesn't publish something, chances are only a few people know about it. It is the media's job to provide us with enough information to make an informed choice in the election. If they don't force Palin to speak with them, how informed will our votes be?

Stump The Candidate

2008-09-22T12:50:00.001-05:00

This video epitomizes something that drives me crazy about Sarah Palin. She refuses to answer questions directly. In this instance, she forgoes a chance to explain her foreign policy credentials and simply declares, "I'll be ready." Wow. That's very reassuring.

Pranksters

2008-09-22T12:46:00.003-05:00

This is one of my favorite skits on Saturday Night Live in recent years. It's not political.

Her Nibs, At It Again

2008-09-22T12:38:00.002-05:00

On Saturday, Her Nibs got in trouble. She has learned how to make "designs" on the computer, by which I mean she sits at the computer, types away on a blank word processor document, and calls it a design. Saturday morning, Her Nibs asked us (before we got up) if she could make designs. Plainbellied told her that she had to wait for one of us to go downstairs and supervise. When I got down a little while later, she was sitting at the computer, typing. Of course she got in trouble, compounded by the fact that she lied and told me that Plainbellied had authorized the activity. So I gave her a timeout. When that was over, she was still sad, so she stomped off up the stairs, looking for her mom.

This is where it got fun. She was supposed to go to a friend's birthday party that afternoon, and she started saying, "I don't feel like going to the birthday party anymore!" (sniff). So Plainbellied said, "That's OK. You don't have to go to the party." We both figured she would change her mind and everything would be all right, but we had no idea how funny it would be when she did. About two minutes later, I heard her come out of her room, still crying, but shouting, "But what if they need me, Mummy? What if they need me at the party?" Needless to say, she decided to go, if only to help the mermaids find their treasure (it was a pirate-themed party).

McCain on Spain

2008-09-18T13:23:00.008-05:00

I had decided not to post anything negative today, but I just couldn't let this slide. Many of you know that Plainbellied and I spent a year living in Spain, and my brother and his wife both spent two years there. My primary research specialty is Spanish history. So you can imagine that my ears perk up when that country is mentioned.

Senator McCain did an interview with a Miami affiliate of Cadena Ser, a Spanish news radio company. When the interviewer asked him about the Prime Minister of Spain, Jose Luis Zapatero, it sounded like McCain thought Spain was in Latin America, and he never responded directly to questions of whether or not he would meet with Zapatero. I don't really believe that McCain doesn't know where Spain is, but his evasive answers were troubling nonetheless.

The Washington Post wrote about it this morning.

Here is the English audio if you are interested:

If you prefer the Spanish version:

Troopergate

2008-09-17T14:19:00.005-05:00

Maybe you've heard of "Troopergate." If you haven't, read this article from the Anchorage Daily News. It gives a good sense of what is at stake. The part that has always stuck out to me is the accusation that Wooten used a Taser on his 10-year-old son. Today, curiosity got the better of me, and I found this article, also from the Anchorage Daily News and written well before Palin was chosen as McCain's running mate.

Read them for yourself and decide. Wooten is definitely no prize, but was Palin justified in going after him and firing Walter Monegan for refusing to bend to her will? Hopefully we'll start getting some answers soon, though not if Palin insists on her refusal to cooperate with the probe.

John McCain and Marital Fidelity

2008-09-17T14:09:00.004-05:00

I was going to do some kind of blog today about the failure of John McCain's first marriage, so I tried to find this article from the LA Times. It took me a while, and I found this article in a British newspaper. So I've decided not to do any kind of extensive rant or anything, and just let readers see what we know about it. If you're interested to know how he treats his current wife, then you should look at this article (beware as it contains some filthy language--just as it came out of McCain's mouth).

The bottom line here is that McCain has been less than honest about his motives for divorcing his first wife, he was clearly unfaithful to her, and he dumped her as soon as he found a richer, more attractive woman. While this has no bearing on the issues of this campaign, it has bearing on the character of the man. Distasteful.

Classic Jibjab

2008-09-17T09:25:00.001-05:00

Plainbellied sent this link to me yesterday. It's another political parody from the guys at Jibjab.com. I hope that you enjoy it. It's fun no matter which side you are on.

My Take on Sarah Palin

2008-09-16T12:11:00.005-05:00

When John McCain announced his choice of running mate several weeks ago, I think I had the same reaction as most people. "Who???!!!" Granted, she is a governor, but how many governors can you name, let alone the governor of one of our least populous states (ahead of only North Dakota, Vermont, and Wyoming)? Since that time, I have been doing everything I can to learn more about her. I do not like what I have found. There is a lot to say about Sarah Palin, and very little of it is good. Plainbellied already wrote about this on her blog, but I thought I'd give my two cents as well.

Let us examine some of the issues at play:

1) Experience. The McCain campaign spent all summer telling us how inexperienced and dangerous Barack Obama would be if elected. Then, he chose Sarah Palin, who spent two terms as a mayor of a town with fewer than 10,000 inhabitants and 20 months as governor of the 47th most populous state. Immediately the McCain campaign changed its tune and declared that her "executive experience" outweighed Barack Obama's eight years in the Illinois State Senate and four years in the US Senate. To put it bluntly, I believe that Sarah Palin is woefully unprepared to be anywhere near the Presidency of the United States. Remember what happened with the last governor we elected?

2) Record. Over the past few weeks I've noticed a number of worrisome trends in Sarah Palin's record. The main problem I see is her penchant for fiscal irresponsibility. In Wasilla, the tiny town she controlled, she inherited a situation in which there were real infrastucture problems with things like sewage treatment, and she focused her attention not on these issues, but on the building of a sports complex for the community. While it was intended to bring more money into the municipal coffers, the plan for this structure was poorly designed and executed, and it was constructed on land that the town did not clearly own. Years and millions in legal fees later, most recognize the complex as a money pit. While mayor, she hired a Washington lobbyist to bring earmarked funds to Wasilla, succeeding in getting some 27 million dollars for the town. Even so, she left the town, which had about 1 million dollars in debt at the beginning of her term, more than 24 million dollars in debt. Even the conservative Wall Street Journal has exposed this problem. Why? Big ticket items like the sports complex and parks, leaving things like a sewage treatment plant undone.

As governor, Palin has proclaimed herself a maverick and a reformer. Neither is true. It is true that she launched herself into the limelight by exposing the unethical behavior of a rival who was using his government office and time to campaign. Of course, she did the very same thing while she was mayor. This, along with numerous other examples from her political career show her to be a conniving opportunist who does not play by the same rules she sets for others. While she did raise taxes on the oil industry, she also continued the practice of getting huge amounts of government earmarks, including championing the so-called "Bridge to Nowhere."

Since she joined the campaign, the level of untrue attacks has risen alarmingly. While both campaigns have distorted their opponents' record to some extent, the McCain campaign has aggressively sought to present a totally incorrect image of Obama and his record. When the McCain campaign quoted factcheck.org (a nonpartisan group) in support of its ads, factcheck denounced the ads as false and misleading. The campaign has also misled the public on Palin's record, having to admit that she never traveled into Iraq and stopped in Ireland only for refueling on her trip.

3) Ethics. Governor Palin is currently under legislative investigation for ethics violations. It appears that she fired the state Public Safety Commissioner for refusing to fire her ex-brother-in-law, a state trooper. While the trooper in question is clearly problematic, he was suspended for some of his activities, and the Commissioner considered the matter closed. When Palin was elected governor, she almost immediately began (along with her husband and numerous staffers) pressuring the Commissioner to fire the trooper. When he would not, she fired him. Before she was chosen as McCain's running mate, Palin agreed to fully cooperate with the probe. Once McCain made the announcement, her aides pulled out of scheduled meetings with the legislature's investigator. Today she announced that she would not cooperate. This is a terrible precedent. The current president and his staff have done the same thing by invoking "executive privilege" to avoid answering congressional subpoenas. Do we want more government secrecy in the future?

Speaking of secrecy, Palin and her aides also championed the use of personal email accounts as a way to circumvent open records laws, even though this is an egregious violation of the law and the public trust. One of the reasons we don't know much about Palin's dealings with her aides is her use of private, unaccounted-for email addresses.

Equally troubling is the record of how many people she has fired. In her time both as mayor and as governor, Palin has wielded executive authority as a weapon to silence her critics and promote her allies. In Wasilla, she totally gutted the town's leadership, seeking to fire the librarian, and successfully firing the local museum director, plus the police chief and some of her own advisors who opposed her policies. Those who oppose her are branded "haters" and eliminated as soon as possible. Not only does she fire her enemies, but she appoints unqualified friends to important positions, such as her friend that she hired as the head of the State Division of Agriculture whose primary qualification appears to be her childhood love of cows.

Just a few months ago she said she didn't know what the Vice President does.

More recently, she couldn't explain her position on the Bush Doctrine. (I wouldn't have known the answer either, but I'm not running for VP!) Notice how totally surprised Charlie Gibson was when she couldn't answer his question:

After all is said and done, what do those close to Sarah Palin think? Well, one of her friends from Wasilla wrote an email for her friends outside of Wasilla who kept asking about Palin. The message has been confirmed by numerous sources to be true. If you want to know more about the type of person we have running for Vice President, go ahead and read it.

In beginning the process of learning about Palin, I tried very hard to be dispassionate, but having learned more about her, I must conclude that she should not be placed a heartbeat away from the presidency. If nothing else, such a reckless and unconsidered choice must reflect badly on John McCain, who has a penchant for high-stakes gambling. This time, he's not gambling with his wife's millions. He's gambling with our future.

Turtar Enters the Arena

2008-09-15T16:13:00.003-05:00

John McCain's decision to make Sarah Palin his running mate has caused me to become more politically involved. Unfortunately for them, this is a negative. I believe that our nation would make a tragic mistake by electing John McCain and Sarah Palin to the highest offices in the land.

First, a little background. . . In 2000, I voted for President for the first time (I could have voted in 1996 but was overseas and failed to get an absentee ballot). In that case, I was living in Florida and voted for George W. Bush. Primarily, I voted for him because I am mostly a moderate conservative (I straddle the fence on a lot of issues). I had serious problems with the way the Clinton administration had behaved itself, and I hoped that Bush's presidency would bring real change to Washington. Then the September 11, 2001 terrorist attacks intervened, and everything changed. Bush spearheaded a campaign to introduce a wildly invasive domestic spying law, and he began to play a zero-sum game with politics. You were either for him or an enemy. Incredibly, I had failed to learn my lesson, and I voted for Bush again in 2004. I remember thinking, "We have a population of nearly 300 million people, and these two idiots are the best we can do for President." Sadly, I believe that I was swayed, at least in some measure, by the Swift Boat Veterans for Truth, who spread lies and rumors defaming John Kerry's military record. But I wanted a certain type of Supreme Court Justice, which I got in John Roberts and Sam Alito, who I think are excellent judges.

However, I now wonder if I made the right choice. In exchange for those two judges, important as they may be, we now have a crippled economy due to an aggressive policy of government deregulation, a war that is dragging on due to inefficient management, government spying, a secretive military prison allowing the torture of prisoners who are kept for years without being charged or tried, and an incredibly secretive government bent on hiding its actions from the public. This is not what I wanted when I voted for George W. Bush, and in many ways I regret that I did not fully comprehend what his government was doing over the past few years.

Because of my disillusionment with the failed policies of George W. Bush, who I helped to elect, I have vowed to make a more careful choice in the future. As a result, I have changed my criteria for voting to reflect a candidate's potential governing style, preferring honesty, integrity, and openness whereas in the past I focused on a narrow range of policy positions. Because of my new criteria, I support Barack Obama for President of the United States.

I have been an Obama supporter for many months now, though I have never donated to his campaign. I disagree with Senator Obama on numerous issues, but I agree more than I disagree. His opponents have criticized him for being "just words." However, they miss the larger message of his campaign. They miss the concept of togetherness and unity, of bipartisanship and civility in government. During the 1990s, the Republican Party made politics in the United States a culture war, trying to contrast righteous "conservatives" with underhanded and immoral "liberals." This dichotomy is false. Too many "conservatives" have shown that they pay mere lip service to the values they espouse, and too many "liberals" have proven to be much more honest and thoughtful than their political opponents.

I do not know if Barack Obama will be a great president, but of the remaining candidates, he is the only one who has tried to put aside partisan rancor. I believe that an Obama presidency would restore, honor, dignity, and openness to the office of President. I cannot say the same of John McCain, who glorifies in promoting his own ignorance and stoops to new levels of subterfuge and dishonesty in attacking his opponents.

Over the next weeks, you will hear more from me on these issues. I will try to post relevant topics in this space every day, complete with useful links.

Down Syndrome Hoe-Down

2008-09-15T09:22:00.005-05:00

For those of you who follow Plainbellied's blog, you will know by now that our unborn son has been diagnosed with Down Syndrome. While there was an elevated risk for Down Syndrome in our case, you can imagine how difficult it was to learn that our child would be born with this disability. I feel for those who don't find out before the child is born. Soon after we received our diagnosis, a colleague of mine told me that his sister had given birth to a child with Down Syndrome. They had no idea until the baby was born, when the doctor told them. I cannot imagine how difficult it would be to hear such news at that time. By the time our son is born next month, we will have had months of mental and emotional preparation. I hope it serves us well when the time comes.

When I first heard the news, I remember feeling shock and disappointment. I hadn't set any specific goals or had any specific hopes for our child, but I realized that his life was going to be a challenge, not just to him, but to us, too. Because children with Down Syndrome have such a wide range of capabilities and challenges, we still don't know what is in store. It will take years before we truly understand what developmental and physical challenges he will face. It is daunting to know that your child will have something wrong with him, but that you will only discover what exactly it is over a long period of time. There will always be the potential for a new wrinkle.

I'm still apprehensive about what the future holds, and in learning more about the problems my niece (who has Down Syndrome) is having with seizures, I find myself worrying about how we will deal with such challenges. I don't doubt that we will figure it out as we go along, but from here, it sure seems like a big mountain to climb.

Thoughts on Moving

2008-07-22T15:52:00.002-05:00

So here's how things have panned out (I'm the least consistent blogger in the world, if you haven't noticed). My dissertation won the award it was nominated for, I got a job, and we're moving back east in a week and a half. The two most terrifying parts of this are: 1) we're going to be broke for another year and 2) we still don't have a place to live yet. Hopefully we'll have our living situation worked out soon, but it's going to be a rough year. Who would have thought it would cost so much to live near the ocean?

In other news, we're expecting another child, a boy, in October, and he's been diagnosed prenatally with Down Syndrome. We're still learning to cope with this news, and we are learning all we can about the disease, so I'll likely have some blog entries about that coming up.

I'd say to stay tuned, but if you're reading this you know it might be a while.

Whither Turtar?

2008-03-18T04:10:00.002-05:00

I'm realizing that this is my second "where did I go?" post in a row. Well, the last months have been pretty rough. I finished my PhD last summer, and I've been working as a visiting instructor at a major university in the Rocky Mountains. In case you're wondering, "visiting" really means "replacement faculty, so there's not really a chance we'll keep you beyond the limit of your contract." In other words, you are employed by a history department, but you don't really "belong" there. You don't get the research or travel budget regular employees get, and they stick you with whatever courses they want, rather than letting you choose what you will teach. Then they boot you to the curb. And we thank them for it because really, it was better than nothing. I'm in a job market where there are about 30 regular tenure-track jobs per year, and some of them have upwards of 200 applicants. Unless you do something to really stand out, then you won't get a job.

So I'm starting to panic a little bit that I don't have a job lined up for next fall yet. I have a young family, and no matter what, I need to get something with benefits, even if that means stepping out of my chosen profession for a year or so. Now, all of this is build-up for something that may not have an actual payoff. Anyway, in this state, I got word yesterday that my dissertation has been nominated for a prize. Like I said, everything that makes you stand out is a great thing. I don't think it will have much of an impact on my CV, but hey, it's something. Who knows? Maybe I'll even win the prize.

My disappearance explained

2007-06-22T16:57:00.000-05:00

OK, so the already limited number of people reading my blog has probably dwindled to nothing. But I need to explain my absence. While it has been over a month since last I wrote, I never intended to give up the blog. I just got really, truly, insanely busy. Something had to give, and my blog simply had to fall by the wayside. Now I have more time.

Here's what I accomplished: I finished my dissertation, defended it, and moved almost all the way across the country. Plus I organized my lectures for the two courses I'm going to teach this summer. Sound like a lot? No? How about if I mention that we moved all of our stuff out of our house to a storage unit and made lots of repairs on the house itself? I thought you might agree.

I'm a bit tuckered out from the 2.5 day, 2400 mile journey we finished last night, so I'm going to end here for now. I promise to give more details in the next few days, though. I'll just leave you with this thought: I think that the Comfort Suites is a great hotel. We arrived at the one in St. Joseph, MO around 10:00 PM on Wednesday night, and their pool was still open. Each room had a sitting area, and the continental breakfast was much better than most.

Her Nibs's New Pastime

2007-05-15T20:16:00.000-05:00

Her Nibs loves to be naked. She's started a new hobby. When her clothes come off in preparation for bedtime, she bolts away from whichever one of us is changing her clothes and runs around in circles shouting, "Nakedy, nakedy, nakedy. . . ." It's actually pretty hilarious.

Cavemen on TV?

2007-05-15T17:46:00.000-05:00

I read a little bit about the fall television schedules today, and I've got to say that I'm less than impressed. I tend to watch more TV than I should, but there are only a few television shows that I specifically make time for, and none of them are on ABC, which, regardless of its popularity right now, actually makes what I consider to be the worst shows. This fall appears to be no exception. They've created a spinoff of Grey's Anatomy, which I personally hate, and to top it all off, there's a show about those cavemen from the Geico ads.

Now, don't get me wrong. I don't have a problem with cavemen, per se (I loved Phil Hartman as Unfrozen Caveman Lawyer), but this show just seems like a bad idea. Geico makes the worst commercials.I just want to step on the stupid gecko with the accent, and the cavemen are just too creepy. For some reason I shiver whenever they come on my television, and I instinctively change the channel. I really don't think I could possibly watch an entire episode of them. It would weird me out too much. I know Plainbellied agrees with me on this one, but are we the only ones?

In related, sad news, it looks like Andy Barker, P.I., was not picked up by NBC. That's sad, because it was a really clever show. It was one of very few shows that I looked forward to each week during its short run (kind of like Psych on USA, which we download from iTunes whenever there is a new episode). Raines appears to be gone as well. I do have high hopes for the new Bionic Woman show, though I have found myself somewhat uninterested by Heroes.

Anyway, I guess that's enough of that. It's probably good there aren't a lot of shows I like. Maybe I'll stop watching so many shows that I don't.

One other thing

2007-05-13T05:48:00.000-05:00

While I'm talking about reality television, I should mention this. I'm not a fan of "The Bachelor." It's a really horrible idea for a show, and the few episodes I've seen were some of the worst television ever (although "Joe Millionaire" was worse). However, if you either love or hate the show, you might be interested in the "Sports Gal" blog about the show.

For those who aren't familiar, the Sports Gal is the wife of ESPN's Sports Guy, Bill Simmons, who writes about sports from a fan's perspective (he's from Boston, so I naturally gravitate toward his opinions on a lot of issues). Last season he decided that he wanted to put a theory about predicting football outcomes to the test, so when he wrote his weekly picks column, where he predicted who would win each of the coming weeks' games, he had his wife (who he claims knows nothing about football) pick as well. In return, his wife (they claim) demanded to be given a column of her own without restrictions. It turned out to be hilarious and insightful, and Plainbellied and I looked forward to her column every week. At the end of the season, she actually had a better record than her husband, essentially proving his point that the people picking winners have no better chance than a novice.

Well, I guess ABC liked what it had seen in her column (since they own ESPN), and the fact that she made occasional references to "The Bachelor," and they asked her to write a column about that show this season. It's really funny, and she doesn't pull any punches. I even admit to watching about ten minutes of the show one week in preparation for her column. ABC should give her a medal just for that.

Lawsuits and "Reality"

2007-05-13T05:27:00.000-05:00

I've mentioned before that Plainbellied really likes "Extreme Makeover: Home Edition," and that I think its smarmy and lame. I'm more of a "This Old House" kind of person, not a "Queen for a Day" type. Well, it looks like "Extreme Makeover" is getting sued by some of the people it featured on an episode of the show. I actually remember the episode pretty well, and I have an idea of what's going on in the case (I heard about it when they first sued a year or two ago). It's an interesting case that deals with two issues: our litigation-happy society and "reality" television.

Here's the gist of what's going on. A group of five siblings lost both of their parents and were taken in by another family. The kids nominated their new caregivers for the "Home Edition" makeover, and ABC signed a contract to rebuild the house. They sent the family on vacation and got to work, putting together a massive house for all of them to live in (the older kids got cars and stuff, too). This all took place in a short time, then ABC basically left. Within a short time, the kids had been kicked out of the house and separated, living among friends. Then they sued ABC the family that they had been living with, and the builder.

The specifics of the case are disputed, but the kids say they were intimidated and bullied in a deliberate campaign to get them to move out of the house. The family they had been living with says that after the show, the kids stopped respecting the rules they had agreed to when they moved in, which led to fights and ultimately to the kids moving out. One key point of contention is that the parents had asked the two oldest siblings to get jobs to help pay for expenses.

Now, I'm not a legal expert (or even a fan of big companies), but I'm a little confused about how ABC is responsible for this. The company didn't sign a contract to build a home for the kids. They agreed to build a home for the people who took them in. Obviously the details will be hammered out in court, but I think it's a tragic situation, made worse by the fact that it played out on reality television. Money really changes people. The way that reality television portrays things makes it seem as though they can somehow swoop in, drop a ton of stuff on people, then leave and expect everything to be fine and dandy. I've seen what they give to people, and often, it seems like they are only trying to give lots of stuff, without a real thought about how it might be used. For example, they built a house for another group of siblings who had lost their parents. In an effort to give them "together" time, they put in a wall of televisions, and each kid got a headset, so they could all be watching different things, lost in their own little world, but since they were in the same place, it somehow counted as "family time" (TV as family time is another issue, and I don't have the space or time to cover that here).

The kicker in all of this, though, is that ABC knew the kids had been kicked out when they re-ran the episode a few months later, but they left it exactly as it originally aired. This is hard for me to fathom. I guess it's just one more way that they manipulate the "reality" to get ratings and advertising dollars. Well, maybe "Pirate Captain" will be better.

Kids and Secrets

2007-05-11T06:16:00.000-05:00

I suppose I'm making up for a lack of entries over the past week by writing a bunch today. In fact, I almost forgot a classic story about Her Nibs.

I was talking to her the other day when she told me that "we got you a present, but it's a secret." When I related it to Plainbellied, thinking Her Nibs had totally made it up, she looked like the cat that swallowed the canary. So I pressed a little bit and got a confession. Ha! I still like surprises, though, so I didn't ask what it was. My birthday is less than a month away, so I figured that's what it was.

Last night I found out I was wrong. Plainbellied had gotten new wheels for my rollerblades, which I haven't been able to use for a while. She also replaced her own wheels, so as long as we can get someone to watch Her Nibs (this summer we'll be really close to Grandma), we can go blading. We used to go a lot before we got married and before Her Nibs came along. Since I'm teaching at our alma mater this summer, we can go on the trails we used to take in the mountains. Pretty cool.

Anniversaries

2007-05-11T04:51:00.000-05:00

Today is my fifth anniversary. So far, we've never been able to do anything nice (well, we went to Busch Gardens one year). I'm really looking forward to our tenth, when I have an actual job and can afford to take Plainbellied somewhere nice. I'll never be a rich man (history professors just aren't--assuming I can get a job in my chosen field), but I have a great family, and the last five years have been the best of my life so far. I hope they only get better.

We are going on a date tonight, though. Plainbellied even gave me an invitation. She put it in the mailbox with the rest of the mail. Got a sitter and everything. How cool is that?

Antiques Roadshow and the Beatles

2007-05-11T04:43:00.000-05:00

I learned something really disturbing on "Antiques Roadshow." Someone brought in a copy of the Beatles' "Yesterday and Today" with its original cover. I had never heard of this before, but it turns out that the album cover offended a lot of people, and it got pulled from Sears shelves after only a day. The record company, instead of re-wrapping all of the records, pasted an alternate cover on it. The woman who brought her copy in had bought it the day they sold it with the original cover. Apparently, it's worth like 10,000 dollars.

I've elected not to show the cover here, because I agree that it's wicked disturbing. Let's just say they call it the "Butcher Cover" and it involves dismembered baby dolls, raw meat, and eerie grins. I always knew the Beatles were a bit freaky, but this is ridiculous. Not cool guys . . . not cool. And by the way, Pete Townshend was right, your music isn't really that good.

LPs, CDs, and MP3s

2007-05-11T03:54:00.000-05:00

I've been thinking about music a lot lately. I picked up the new Rush album this week, and I think I like it. The songs sound good, but the mastering is pretty bad (see "Loudness War" at Wikipedia). The lyrics, as usual, are kind of hit-or-miss. Neil Peart isn't the intellectual a lot of people think, but I usually don't pay attention to the lyrics, anyway. Occasionally he'll write something I really like, as in this line from "Far Cry" on the new album: "One day I feel I'm ahead of the wheel/And the next it's rolling over me." I don't know why I like this line, but it feel both playful and profound. The melodies and rhythms are what get me, though. Rush has always done a good job at constructing songs. I'm even more excited to see them this summer.

But I've drifted from the topic I intended to discuss. the two albums I've been listening to the most recently are Cheap Trick "At Budokan" and the new Rush, and it has made me think of how CDs changed the way we listen to music, and how the iPod is doing the same again. Let me stick with the "At Budokan" disc. I mainly listen to just a couple of tracks, but I listened to the whole thing the other day. What I realized is that when I was a kid, I only ever listened to side 2 of the record. I don't even recognize the songs from side 1 of the album. Then I started thinking about other albums from when I was a kid, like "2112" by Rush and Led Zeppelin IV and others, and I realized that I only listened to one side of many of them. I remember "2112" distinctly because one of my brother's friends made me listen to side 2 in the 1990s, and I had never heard some of the songs there. Other albums, like "Who's Next" by the Who were more likely to get a listen on both sides.

In any case, it was perfectly possible to have a favorite side of an album or cassette. With the advent of the CD, that became a thing of the past. Bands could now put more songs on albums, and no decision had to be made about which side to put them on. Of course, the difference was now that instead of moving the needle to skip a song or having to fast-forward all the way through a track, you could skip songs with the push of a button.

Then along came the MP3, which made it possible to choose songs a-la-carte. The Apple iTunes store is a perfect example of this. You can now simply download the song you want (for free if you are that kind of person) and not have to get the entire album. With the iPod and other digital music players, you can create playlists easily (without having to go to crazy lengths to tape a record), so albums are becoming less and less relevant.

I'm not trying to pass judgement on this, but I think it's an interesting development. Changes in technology are really influencing how we listen to music.

PBS Documentary

2007-05-06T04:31:00.000-05:00

Last week, PBS showed a documentary on Mormons over two nights. I've been thinking about this for a few days, so now I'd like to share some thoughts. A lot of people have been asking me about it. My doctoral advisor, who knows I am Mormon, asked me what I thought, and I told him mostly what I will say here. It's very rare that we even speak about non-academic issues, so that really told me how significant this documentary was.

As members of a church long regarded as on the fringes of American society, one might understand why our community was a bit apprehensive. Recent events involving polygamous split-off groups and Mitt Romney's political aspirations have put a spotlight on us in ways we may or may not be comfortable with. Add to that a Mormon persecution complex and a general fear among us of learning too much about our past, and our fears becomes even more understandable. I think this is the best review of the documentary. It does a good job of highlighting the good and bad aspects.

There was a big build-up during the week before the airing. The Church actually posted an article about it on the official website, clarifying that the Church itself had cooperated with the filmmakers but had not had any control over the final product. Then the NY Times and other major newspapers reviewed it rather favorably. I resolved to watch it before passing any sort of judgment.

Well, I thought it was good overall. I appreciated that they spoke candidly about many issues, and I liked that they allowed both friend and foe alike to speak. I think that it gave a generally good view of the complexity of Mormon life. Many Church members were upset at the portrayal of modern polygamy, but I thought that the documentary did a good job of distancing the official Church from that problem, and I especially liked how they portrayed the difficulties some face in trying to find a place in our culture.

The only major issue I have is the coverage of the Mountain Meadows Massacre, and this comes from my training as an historian. The documentary devoted 20 minutes to this topic, giving it a separate segment all to itself. While this was a heinous act perpetrated by a group of Mormons, looking at the MMM out of context is quite problematic. The documentary gave much more space to this single incident than they did to the persecutions the church suffered in New York, Ohio, Missouri, and Illinois. Also, they relied too much on the work of the "historian" Will Bagley (actually a newspaper columnist), who can't actually find evidence to back up his assertions of complicity among Church leadership (because there isn't any). The massacre, perpetrated by a relatively small group of isolated Mormons and Native Americans in the context of the Utah War, really deserved better treatment than it received.

Other than that, I found it relatively fair and insightful, if uncomfortable for some members of the Church.

Cheap Trick

2007-05-06T04:01:00.000-05:00

In a nod to Rhonda, I had to put this up. Yesterday we went to Lowe's to pick up some stuff, and as we were driving, Plainbellied actually requested that I put on "I Want You To Want Me" from Cheap Trick's At Budokan album that I bought not too long ago. It was a very exciting moment. Her Nibs even demanded that we all sing along with the song, which she also enjoyed very much, even if she didn't know the words.

Laptops in Education

2007-05-05T04:18:00.000-05:00

In Friday's NY Times, they had an article on the introduction of laptop computers into school classrooms. It's interesting because it discusses the fact that many schools are now giving up the programs they started, even while many other schools are still developing their programs. You may recall that I have issues with the over-focus of American schools on test scores. I don't think they do much good for students, and they are playing a key role in the dumbing-down of American children (I think).

Well, I look at the laptop issue in a similar fashion. There are those who think that cutting edge is always best, and that technology can cure all problems, so long as it is used properly. I personally applaud the schools for getting rid of the computers. I think they do more harm than good. Often, people claim that poorer schools are somehow technologically deficient and that explains the disparities in test scores, when in reality it isn't a technological problem. It is a social problem. Studies are now showing that students in the laptop programs don't do any better on tests.

In fact, it looks like students are becoming complacent, using the computers for recreational purposes, and even taking advantage of the laptops to cheat in school. Laptops are useless in helping students learn how to read or write well. Technological savvy should not be a goal. It should be a tool, and putting it above learning how to think does our children a disservice.

I am particularly disturbed by the conclusions of one researcher who, after concluding that the computers did not affect test scores, argued the following:

“Where laptops and Internet use make a difference are in innovation, creativity, autonomy and independent research,” he said. “If the goal is to get kids up to basic standard levels, then maybe laptops are not the tool. But if the goal is to create the George Lucas and Steve Jobs of the future, then laptops are extremely useful.”

Frankly, I don't buy it. Creativity can be taught just as well with a pencil and paper as with a laptop. There are larger problems at work, and the following quote from the article summarizes my feelings on the matter (especially since I teach history):

In the school library, an 11th-grade history class was working on research papers. Many carried laptops in their hands or in backpacks even as their teacher, Tom McCarthy, encouraged them not to overlook books, newspapers and academic journals.

“The art of thinking is being lost,” he said. “Because people can type in a word and find a source and think that’s the be all end all.”

My students recently submitted a term paper for an advanced college-level history course, and I found that many of them were reluctant to actually go to the library to find books. They thought (wrongly) that everything they needed was on the Internet. Because of this attitude, a number of them did quite poorly on the paper, because they misunderstood fundamental issues.

Now that I've written this, I need to clarify that I am not against teaching technology. I use my computer for much of what I do. However, it is only a tool. There are things for which it is quite unsuited. Even when I do find relevant articles online (many academic journals now publish online, through subscription services like JStor), I usually print them up to read and to mark up. The computer is just a tool for finding them.

I do think that schools should conduct computer classes (we had to take a typing class), and classes should have access to computers for relevant projects, but they really need to focus on what is most important. That should be teaching our children to think. Unfortunately, they're so set on test scores and technology that many seem to have lost track of that.

I wish I had something pithy to say at the end of this post, but I don't. Oh well. At least I got through it without saying "puke." (oops, there it is.)

Movie weekend

2007-05-01T03:18:00.000-05:00

This weekend, Plainbellied and I saw three new movies. On Friday night, we watched "Rocky Balboa." Plainbellied had never seen "Rocky" until after we got married, and she's not very familiar with the earlier movies. I really like the first four, though (usually I pretend "Rocky V" never happened). Well, I'm not really into "Rocky II," but I really like "Rocky," "Rocky III," and "Rocky IV." I have to say that I enjoyed "Rocky Balboa." If you're not familiar, it follows the same basic storyline of "Rocky," but it's about life after Adrian and how Rocky tries to relate to his kid. It's a schmarmy, feel-good kind of movie, and I am not ashamed to say that I liked it. There are even a few memorable scenes where Rocky talks sense into his son. If I had a choice, though, I'd probably watch I, III, or IV before renting this one again.

On Saturday we saw "Hot Fuzz." It was amazing. I haven't laughed so hard in a long time. If you've ever seen an action movie, then you may love it (noticeable influences are "Point Break" and "Bad Boys II"). The plot itself is engaging, if absurd, but it's really the dialogue that makes the film. It does start off a bit slow, but that's all right, because once it gets going, it doesn't really stop. There are a number of running gags, but they aren't annoying. The only caveats I'll make is that it is incredibly graphic in its depiction of violence, and there is a fair amount of cursing. It is definitely not a family movie. If you have a weak stomach, don't go. If that's not a problem for you, then you may have the same experience we did when we saw it in a filled theater where everyone was absolutely laughing their head off.

When we got home that night, we popped in "The Queen," which Plainbellied got from Netflix. Frankly, I didn't like it. It isn't my kind of film. I didn't like any of the characters. I never had any sympathy for Diana, even. More than anything, watching everyone interact made me wonder why the British would maintain the monarchy for so long. I'm not a fan of bowing and scraping. It particularly bothers me that when the Prime Minister, elected by the British people, goes to meet the Queen, he has to bow and he can't turn his back to walk out of the room, and he actually has to ask her permission to form a government. I realize these are all simply formalities, but come on! Why biology should be considered a reasonable way to choose a head of state is beyond me.

Plainbellied later confessed that she didn't realize that the whole movie was about Diana's death. She thought it was a biopic of Elizabeth II. I don't think she'll make that mistake again.

If you don't like vomit. . .

2007-04-29T06:46:00.000-05:00

. . . stop reading now. Also, keep in mind that I'm exhausted, so this might not be the stellar writing quality you're used to on this blog.

Imagine this scene: a child lies asleep on the living room floor, at her mother's feet (literally between the chair and the ottoman). The mother sits, half-watching "Pride and Prejudice" (with Colin Firth and Jennifer Ehle), and nodding off to sleep. The father, tired, sits to write a blog entry.

As you have guessed, that's what our house looks like right now. While I normally spend my nights working on either my dissertation or my teaching responsibilities, last night was different. Plainbellied and I got a baby-sitter and went to the movies with some friends. We saw "Hot Fuzz" (loved it! look for a review soon). After we came home, things seemed great. Her Nibs was in bed and had eaten a lot for a change. Plainbellied and I watched "The Queen" (not my kind of movie), then she went to bed and I sat down to grade papers at 1:00 AM.

That was the end of the good times. Usually, it's my job to put Her Nibs back in bed if she wakes up at night. Around 3:00 AM, I heard her start crying, so I went upstairs to put her back to sleep. She seemed fine, but as I started to put her down, she started crying again, so I picked her up. As I did so, she puked all over me. I've seen vomit, but this was more than I had seen go on a single person. My shirt and pants were soaked, and it reeked. Frankly, it made me want to vomit.

Since I was already soaked, I got Her Nibs into the bathroom and turned on the water. This is when I realized I couldn't do it alone. So I yelled for Plainbellied, who had only been asleep for two hours, to wake up and help me. My plan was to start Her Nibs in the bath and turn her over to Plainbellied while I went and cleaned up the mess left on the carpet. Things went well, but we took her downstairs while I cleaned to make sure that everything had come up.

After about an hour, I had finished cleaning, and Her Nibs was ready to go back to bed. I started rinsing off our clothes when I heard Plainbellied cry out, "Come help me!" When I went back, Her Nibs had puked on Plainbellied, and we now had a new mess to clean up. So we put Her Nibs back in the bathtub to clean her up, and I worked on the clothes and carpet. After a while, she really wanted to go to bed, because she was so tired. But, as she walked to the stairs, she yakked on the carpet. Another bath and now there were no clean nightgowns. More cleaning. At around 5:00, things had calmed down, so we finally got to put her back to bed.

You probably know what happened next. Her Nibs puked on the bed. At least we had figured out that we shouldn't give her anything to eat or drink by now, so she only had a little bit left. Plainbellied took her into the shower while I cleaned up the bed. I learned that it's much easier to clean up a plastic-covered bed than to clean up carpet, and I was happy about that. We put her in bed again, and she finally started to go to sleep, even though her pig was now in the wash, a casualty of the previous attempt to put Her Nibs in bed. Thirty seconds later, she came out of her room and said, "I have to puke." She likes to use that word. She also says things like, "I'm not pukey anymore," or "I got puke all over!"

From then on, we knew how to play it. Since we caught it, no bath was needed. But now she was staying with us for good. She sat on Plainbellied's lap for a while, and we came up with a system: Plainbellied held a cup, and I had a wet paper towel ready. Every half hour or so, Her Nibs said, "I have to puke," so we put up the cup, and she puked in it, then I wiped her up, rinsed out the cup, and replaced it with a clean one. She actually got a little sleep on Plainbellied's lap, and then she crawled onto the floor and fell asleep there. And there we stand. I'm about to go to the store for ginger ale, Plainbellied is going in and out of sleep on the chair watching "Pride and Prejudice," and Her Nibs is asleep on the floor (at least until she has to vomit again).

By now, you're grossed out, and you wonder why I told you all of this. I'm not trying to set us up as a pair of martyrs. I've learned something tonight. I'm at the point now where I am way past my bedtime, and I didn't get much sleep yesterday. Plainbellied only got a few hours of sleep last night. We're exhausted. But neither of us got grouchy. It is frustrating and maddening to watch your child get sick, but neither of us resents it. When Her Nibs first threw up on me, I felt like I was doing exactly what a parent is supposed to do. Our kid throws up on us, we clean it, and we don't complain.

Don't get me wrong, it's not fun. It sucks (and smells). But it's what parents do. If you'll excuse me, I need to go clean up some more vomit.

I'm just amazed. . .

2007-04-28T01:08:00.000-05:00

This entire post is the work of a relatively young father bragging incessantly about his incredible daughter. You've been warned.

Her Nibs has discovered a new talent. Recently, she's started drawing (sort of) recognizable faces on drawings. She does it on her own, too. I know I'm an incredibly biased observer, but for some reason it seems to me that she's a bit advanced with her small motor skills.

There. My bragging impulse has been satisfied. I included one of her faces below. I know it's not high art, but hey, she's not even three yet.

Whose room is it, anyway?

2007-04-25T05:50:00.000-05:00

When I arrived to teach my class today, my students were all congregated in the hallway. It was a couple of minutes before we were scheduled to begin, and the previous class still hadn't left. This is not unusual, but since there's a fifteen-minute break between classes I don't sweat it. There's plenty of time for me to get set up.

Well, today was different. Class time came, and the other group was still in the room. through the window on the door, it was clear that they were doing class presentations, and as today is the last day of classes, I decided to cut them some slack. After five minutes, though, it was time to put an end to things, because it was getting ridiculous. We needed to have class, too.

I knocked and stuck my head in the door, announcing, "I'm sorry to interrupt, but my class needs this room." Some of you may not believe me, but I was quite polite about it. I totally channelled my "diplomatic" brother, assuming that they simply had lost track of time. Well, I was wrong. The other instructor came over to the door and said, "We came in here because our classroom is not available. Is there another room you could take your class to?" At this point, I got a little angry (I still wasn't rude, though--you can ask my students), and I told her, "No." Inside, I thought (but did not say), "We've been in this room every Tuesday this semester. What makes you think we should go somewhere else? Get out!" Then she had the gall to say, "We'll be done in five minutes." Remember, class was already supposed to begin five minutes ago. Luckily, her students had already begun leaving, so disaster was averted.

I'm still shaking my head fifteen hours later. At least I got a good laugh with my students after the other group left. They couldn't believe it either.

"Bienvenidos a Miami"

2007-04-22T00:56:00.000-05:00

I think that it's only fair to warn you up front that this is going to be a pretty long entry about our trip to Miami Beach. You might want to make yourself comfortable. It's been a busy few days and I have a lot to say (you may judge for yourself whether any of it is worth reading).

In order to prepare for our trip, we downloaded the pilot of 'Miami Vice' from iTunes. I hadn't seen the show for a very long time, and I don't think Plainbellied had ever seen it. I thought it would be fun to find some of the places where they filmed and re-enact scenes, like when Crockett told his partner's wife that he had been killed. Luckily, there was not time for that on this trip.

You may have already read Plainbellied's blog about the drive down, so I'm not going to repeat what she has already said. I will just point out that I generally prefer Mapquest directions, because they tend to send you on a shorter route than other services, and they actually get the time right. Once, I checked it against Google Maps, and Google wanted to send us about 100 miles out of our way (Google does have a better interface, though). I used Mapquest again this time, and we arrived at the door of our hotel within five minutes of the time it had predicted. Making good time is very important to me, and this made me feel pretty good.

It turns out that we made a really good decision on the hotel. Instead of a dive, we stayed in a renovated Art Deco hotel right on Ocean Drive, across the street from the beach. It was a little away from the clubs, so where we were was pretty quiet at night, thank goodness. The room was small, but it was clean, and it had a really nice shower. Normally I hate hotel showers, but I actually felt clean coming out of this one. It had nice marble tile, so it really was nice. That was the best part of the room, though. Mostly, it reminded me of almost every hotel I had stayed at in Spain, which is to say that it had tile floors, adequate beds, and nothing else. The only noticeable difference from a Spanish hotel was the price. My goodness. It should be illegal to charge that much for a tiny hotel room. I'm lucky it was for a conference and my department is footing part of the bill. Otherwise, there is no way we could have done it.

We went to the beach both mornings we were there, and Her Nibs liked it a lot. She wouldn't put her feet in the water by herself, but she would ride the waves with me if I held her. We didn't go very far in, since I'm afraid of sharks, but the water was clear and warm. It was fun. I don't usually like the beach, but since we went early, the sun still wasn't shining, and there weren't crowds. Actually, I saw a guy wake up after a night on the beach when the water started licking his feet. I thought that only happened in the movies. It actually took him a while to realize the water was at his feet. I think he had a good time the night before.

The conference itself was pretty good. The first session I had wanted to go to was cancelled, so I had a chance to catch up with some of the other people there, some of whom I hadn't seen for several years. My session, in the afternoon, was well attended, but unfortunately the other two panelists had more "interesting" topics than I did, so no one bothered to ask me any questions or make comments about my work. Luckily, a few people spoke with me later and I got a few helpful comments. If they hadn't it would have kind of ruined the conference for me, because the whole point is to get input on your work (well, and "network" with people in your discipline). The sessions on Saturday were pretty good, too.

Friday night we went out to dinner, and we found a nice Spanish restaurant just down the street from where the conference was. It is run by an actual Spanish family, and the chef, along with much of the waitstaff, is from Spain as well. Good Spanish food is tough to find in this country, and we were really lucky. When we walked in, it felt Spanish, with tile that looked as though it had come straight from Seville. When the waiters switched to Spanish, they spoke with Madrid accents, and it reminded us of our time there. It also reminded us of a time when we went to a restaurant in Seville with my parents during the Feria de Abril. Everyone was at the fair, so we were almost the only ones in the restaurant. There were like three waiters just for us. The same thing happened in Miami. Because of Her Nibs, we eat early, so we were the first ones in the restaurant. They were all so friendly, and the service was great. The food was even better. We got a sampler of appetizers, so we each got some tortilla española, jamón serrano on bruschetta, and croquetas de jamón. Then Plainbellied got a barbecue pork tenderloin and I got paella valenciana.* Her Nibs nibbled on a salad (salad is her favorite food right now). We got gelato afterward, and I'm sure Plainbellied will tell all about that.

As we walked back to the hotel (the long way), a guy came up to us with a huge snake and asked if we wanted to pet it. Her Nibs was really scared, so the guy asked me if I wanted to hold it. I resisted, but he put it around my neck anyway, and then Her Nibs touched it and laughed. Well, I'm not stupid, and I know that when something like this happens they're going to ask for money. I'm thinking he'll ask for five bucks or something like that as a "donation." But he said, "I take Polaroid pictures of you with the snake for a donation of 20 dollars." He actually said it with a straight face. I know Polaroid makes its money on film, but 20 bucks for a single photo? Not on your life. I turned him down and he move on to the next sucker. It was almost as weird as the time a girl wearing a clown nose (and no makeup) got right up in my face as I walked home one night in Madrid and said, "Oooooooooooooo" while doing some strange dance. Of course, it also reminded me of Hulk Hogan's "24-inch pythons."

The trip was really great, but I should add a couple of caveats. I'm not sure I would have liked it so much if I had just gone there to hang out. I'm not a beach person. An hour in the morning is enough for me, because there were no crowds and the sun wasn't shining. I burn easily, so the beach is not for me. I think I was lucky to have a conference to go to, so I really only had to fill short periods of time with stuff to do, mostly the mornings and dinner time. I'm not into partying either, so most of what the beach has to offer isn't really my style. Also, if I had to pay for the whole thing myself, it would have been too expensive.

Even so, it took the bad taste of my last Miami trip out of my mouth. Maybe there'll be another conference there sometime.

*Tortilla española is basically a potato omelet. Jamón serrano is a Spanish cured ham, kind of like prosciutto but better (second only to jamón ibérico, which is incredible), and Croquetas de jamón are kind of like savory hush puppies with bits of jamón serrano in them. What they called paella valenciana was really paella mixta, which has both chicken and seafood in it. Paella valenciana should have rabbit and spanish chorizo in it, and maybe chicken, but no seafood. I've never had good paella at a restaurant in the US before. It was absolutely great.

SoBe

2007-04-18T16:59:00.000-05:00

As Plainbellied mentioned, we're off to Miami Beach this weekend so I can attend a conference. Finding a hotel was the most recent adventure. A few years ago we went to Miami to get our visas for Spain, and it was a rather unpleasant experience. The highlight was getting room service at the Fairfield Inn (only time we've ever done room service). This time, though, we're going to stay in South Beach (SoBe), which is within walking distance of the conference site. I've heard lots of good things about it, but what people don't tell you is how expensive it is. I learned that in order to get decent accommodations there, it is required to sign away one's firstborn child.

I know Plainbellied covered this in her post, but I'd like to give my perspective on our search for hotel accommodations. I jumped on the first "reasonable" rate I found without clearly thinking it through because the conference hotel rate seemed excessive (from someone who never wants to pay more than 60 dollars a night). Last night, when I went looking for directions, etc., I discovered that people passionately despise the hotel I had booked. I've stayed in dives before, so I was prepared for the worst, and if I were going alone it would have been all right. However, since Plainbellied and Her Nibs are coming, I had second thoughts. As you can see from Plainbellied's description, there were some serious problems with the other place. I can tell the difference between a crank who simply didn't like the hotel and serious problems. Since multiple reviewers kept bringing up the same issues, it raised a major red flag. Instead of gutting it out, we decided to swallow our pride and chalk up the one-night cancellation penalty to a "learning experience."

There are still a few minor issues about the new place, but it looks to be sanitary, safe, and friendly (if possibly a bit loud). Apart from a few of the usual crusty reviewers, most people really like it. As long as we're not looking for luxury accommodations, it should be all right. And since it's one of the old Art Deco hotels, it will at least be interesting to look at.

We'll definitely give a solid write-up about the trip when we return. I'm still a bit intimidated by Miami, but hopefully things will turn out for the best.

Startling New Study

2007-04-17T22:22:00.000-05:00

I like to read The Onion online. As a parent, I found this recent article to be one of the funniest things I've seen in a long time. I hope you enjoy it.

Who's Drinking the Kool-Aid Now?

2007-04-17T11:23:00.000-05:00

Apparently, Kirsten Dunst has a high opinion of herself. Here's the short version. There is talk that Sam Raimi won't make the next Spiderman movie, and that Kirsten Dunst and Tobey Mcguire might not be in it. Dunst thinks that this is "disrespectful" to her and that "audiences aren't stupid. It'd be a big flop without me, Tobey, or Sam."

What do I think? I kind of liked the first two movies. I like a lot of comic-book type films (they're a guilty pleasure). Overall, though, I think the Spiderman movies would have been better without Mcguire and Dunst. I like what Raimi has done, but neither of the lead actors has done a particularly memorable job. Mcguire is OK, but I don't really like his delivery very much. I'm at the point now where I don't actually care if I see the next movie. I've liked the story lines, but the acting is problematic.

Dunst, in particular, has really been terrible. If they dropped her from the films, I would actually be more likely to see it. Take the second film, for example. Dunst's character, Mary Jane, is supposed to be some wonderful actress. But the scenes they show of her onstage in "The Importance of Being Earnest" are terrible. Add to that her bad teeth, and you have the makings of a disaster. Don't get me wrong, I thought that Dunst was solid in "Drop Dead Gorgeous," but I think she's had the same experience as a lot of other actresses. She gets into some serious films and somehow thinks she's a serious actress.

I think it's awfully pretentious of her to think she's somehow indispensable. Somebody needs to give her a reality check.

Maverick and Goose at the Airshow

2007-04-17T00:07:00.000-05:00

Plainbellied and I have made a concerted effort to be more connected to the community where we live. There are a number of things we either didn't know about or simply never went to before. We started with the camping trip we took recently. Since then, we found a nice little pizza place in town that everyone else already seemed to know about and a fifties-style diner in a town about twenty minutes north (that other people already knew as well).

Last weekend, we took another leap and went to the airshow that came to town. Let me give a little background to this. When I was a kid, I had a friend whose family invited me to do things with them occasionally. They took me to a Patriots game against the Jets once and professional wrestling another time (back when it was real). :) Well, at one point they invited me to an airshow. I must have been about ten years old at the time. The problem with the airshow was that they planned to go on a Sunday, which is problematic for religious reasons. While I understand my parents' reasons now, I was very upset at the time. To top it all off, my friends who went came to school the next day to tell me all about their helicopter ride at the airshow.

I have been jealous ever since, and I never got to an airshow until now. We were unable to go a year and a half ago for some reason, so this time we decided that we would go no matter what. We took Her Nibs and our friend Don't Mess with Texas came along, too, after Plainbellied's game. It was a great time. We saw biplanes doing things that should be against the law (of gravity--ha ha ha). They brought out an F-18 fighter jet, and it was absolutely crazy what that thing was capable of. Other than high-speed maneuvers, it actually stayed in the air at under 100 MPH, and it weighs 40,000 lbs. Later they had an F-16 and a wing-walker as well, but watching the F-18 alone was worth the price of admission.

To top it all off, we got to go up in a helicopter. Plainbellied's father flew helicopters in Vietnam, so she's always wanted to go up in one, too. We made sure to take Her Nibs, who had a great time. Plainbellied went in a different helicopter than Her Nibs and I, and hers did some crazy stunts with her in it. I kind of wish I had gotten to go in that one, but I had my ride. I'll probably never get to do it again, and it was totally worth it.

Even though we had a great time, we quickly learned that we were airshow neophytes. It turns out that they don't actually provide seating at these things. I expected bleachers or something, but when we got there everyone else had brought camping chairs. There was also only limited shade. Most people had gotten there early and staked out positions under the wings of airplanes. Luckily, Don't Mess with Texas brought some SPF 50 and we got only very mild sunburns. We also realized immediately that we should have brought the camera.

We also learned that airshows are really loud. Her Nibs got very adept at covering her ears. Jets make a ton of noise, and since we were really close to the runway it was more than I had ever experienced. Every time the F-18 turned away from us, we got a roar from the engines. Anyway, it was an incredible afternoon. We all wanted to immediately rent Top Gun. Luckily, none of us had the energy to follow through on that.

Next up: we're taking a trip to Miami Beach so I can go to a conference. Since I had to get a hotel anyway, we thought we'd make a family trip of it. Should be fun.

Playoff Time

2007-04-16T02:10:00.000-05:00

Plainbellied asked me to write a piece on her game this weekend, because she would prefer that I give my "disinterested" take on it (quotes used for irony). Plainbellied's team lost, 2-0, which most likely means that they are now out of the playoffs for good. About the only highlight of the game for the good guys was Plainbellied in goal. Even though the other team scored twice, the problems lay with the defense, not the keeper. In case you think I'm just showing favoritism, I should point out that I played soccer for years--defense. One fundamental issue Plainbellied's team had was that the defense tended to bunch up and chase the ball, leaving opposing players open to take shots. Plainbellied did the best she could, but they kept shooting, and a couple got past. On offense, Orange Crush simply couldn't shoot. They had a few opportunities, but they missed the goal. Anyway, it was frustrating to watch.

Highlights of the game

One sequence in the second half where Plainbellied's defense completely abandoned her and she had to come out of the goal. She blocked three hard shots in quick succession, leading the crowd (me) to scream, "Nice!!" at the top of its lungs. She had a few other great saves, but that stands out more than any other.

The ref didn't seem to understand what his whistle was for. He tended to wait about thirty seconds to blow it after a foul was committed. I don't think he really knew what he was doing. Seriously, the players got to the point where they had to tell him to blow it when the ball went out of bounds and such. The other team started yelling, "Play the whistle!" because one never could tell if he planned to blow it at all. Absolutely amazing.

One of the opposing players is a friend of ours, and after her team's first game, she complained about how violent the other team played. She even had a scratch across her face to prove it. Well, yesterday, she took on the enforcer role. It was ironic. On one play, she totally tripped one of Plainbellied's teammates who was just about to break a big run past the defense. I screamed, "OOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHH!" really loudly, expressing my displeasure. Probably she should have gotten a red card for the tackle, which seemed pretty malicious. She made two more tackles just like it. One of them sent a player off with a possible ankle sprain. I give her a big thumbs down for her Wayne Rooney imitation (on the link, scroll down to "Disciplinary issues").

Plainbellied's team only had one sub, so when one person went down, neither team had subs. So in the second half, the ref actually called a water break. I couldn't believe it. They only play 25-minute halves. He actually called a water break??!!!

Finally, I got to play the hero. I mentioned that Rooney, Jr. had injured another player. Well, no one had any ice to put on her ankle (it was so hot the ice in their water coolers was melted). Plainbellied asked me, "Don't we have an ice pack in the car first-aid kit?" In fact, we did. Plainbellied deserves the credit for remembering it, but I was the one who ran the 100 yards to the car and brought it back. Of course, one of Plainbellied's teammates is married to a doctor, who happened to be there and could check out the ankle, but I got the ice pack, dang it! That should count for something.

Pseudonyms in History

2007-04-14T02:07:00.000-05:00

The recent hubbub about the blogger code of conduct got me thinking about pseudonyms, which the "code" condones. I like pseudonyms. That's one of my favorite things about the blogosphere. Many historical figures have used pseudonyms, and I think it is a long and noble tradition: Silas Dogood (Ben Franklin), Voltaire (François-Marie Arouet), Mark Twain (Samuel Clemens), and Publius (Alexander Hamilton, James Madison, John Jay in the Federalist Papers) to name a few.

Bigfoot

2007-04-14T01:44:00.000-05:00

I used to think that Bigfoot was just a monster truck. Now I find out that they call Sasquatch by that name, too. I had no idea.

Actually, I did know that, and I was just trying to find a witty opening for this post. Now that I have your attention, I'm going to talk about my feet. I don't have very large feet, but I have a very hard time finding shoes. The problem is that I have very wide feet (2E). The problem with having wide feet is that unless a manufacturer makes shoes in several widths, you have to make up for the width by buying up a size. So you have to get long shoes that look a little funny.

I've overcome the problem in running shoes by switching to New Balance, which does offer varying widths (and arch support, etc). I now wear my running shoes most of the time. However, since I teach, I've decided that I should wear nicer shoes sometimes so that I can actually look the part.

Tonight we went to the mall so my wife could have her eyes checked out (needed new contacts--paint me jealous), and so we stopped in Sears, which was having a sale. Well, there were several very nice looking pairs of shoes, but none of them fit me (well one did, but it had really thin soles, and I could imagine having painful feet at the end of the day). So here I am, without brown shoes. Several years ago, I actually bought a brown belt to wear with the brown shoes I planned to buy. I still haven't bought them. Needless to say, the belt sits unused in my closet. Of course, now it's too small for me to wear, which is a totally separate problem.

Lasik

2007-04-14T01:37:00.000-05:00

I found out today that my brother is getting Lasik surgery. I have to admit that I'm very jealous. I wear thick glasses to correct a terrible astigmatism. Even if I wanted to wear contact lenses, they would have to special fit them. The standard Toric lenses they sell don't work for someone like me. Lasik isn't an option either (even if I had the money). They can only reshape your cornea so much.

On the plus side of this equation . . . Never mind. There is no plus side to this.

Subtitles or Dubbed?

2007-04-14T01:17:00.000-05:00

Plainbellied's recent post on movie remakes made me think of a related issue: subtitles on foreign films. There are a number of different opinions on this issue. Some people prefer dubbing because it means they don't have to read the bottom of the screen to know what's going on. Others prefer subtitles because they want to hear the cadence of the people speaking. For example, watch "Life is Beautiful" in Italian, then try it in English. Roberto Benigni's delivery really makes the film in a lot of ways, and the dubbed English version is a tragedy.

Personally, I prefer subtitles unless it's an action movie or something where I feel they will be too distracting. I get the feeling I'm missing something when I watch dubbed films. Sometimes, if a film has bad audio, we'll put on the subtitles anyway. That's one great thing about DVDs--you can change the audio or subtitle track to what you want. One fun thing to do is to compare the subtitles with the dubbed dialogue. Often they don't match up. It's pretty funny.

I really like watching kung fu movies. They translate all of the special moves each fighter is known for directly, so you get things like the "Flying crane maneuverable death kick" and the "Buddha palm hurricane fist." I think that's fun.

When I watching Spanish films with my wife, I tend to critique their translations. She gets tired of hearing things like, "That's not quite what he said." I'm naturally a know-it-all.

Salad bowl and cups

2007-04-13T04:25:00.000-05:00

I'm posting these images in response to a question from a friend, who wondered what the bowl and cups Plainbellied traded her pig for looked like. Again, my photographs aren't very good, but you can see that the bowl has a motif of birds attacking worms. I've included shots of the inside and the outside of the bowl. We originally had four cups, but I could only find three right now. But you get the idea that they are made with raised designs on the outside. We use them a lot. So now you know.

Well, lookee here!

2007-04-11T09:27:00.000-05:00

Plainbellied located a photograph of the pig I mentioned in my previous post. She also gave me permission to put it up. Of course, she pointed out the technical deficiencies of the piece. I just like it. Note the Salvador Dalí lip couch. I think it's very whimsical.

Plainbellied back in action

2007-04-10T00:16:00.000-05:00

While we are out west this summer, Plainbellied is going to take a ceramics studio class. I'm very excited for her. While I've been doing my PhD, she's put a lot of things on hold, including ceramics. Over the past five years, she's focused more on 2-D art, when she is really much more comfortable molding clay. I am definitely not an expert, but I've seen some of her work, and I really like it. I've posted a few of her earlier pieces below (stuff I like), along with a description of what I know about them.

These three pieces are part of a series Plainbellied did. She has helped me learn to appreciate abstract art. It doesn't always have to make a statement. Sometimes it's all right for art just to look cool. I think she succeeded here. I should apologize for the picture quality. I took them all myself, and I am not very gifted with a camera. These are in my sister-in-law's New York apartment, so we tell people that they're on display in New York.

This photo probably requires more explanation. Apparently, the art department where Plainbellied studied had experimented with a flexible mold material some years ago. They had molds of baby heads and celery bunches. Plainbellied stuck them together. These are on top of the bookshelf in my home office (hence the dust I should have noticed when I took the picture). While admittedly weird, they look cool when put together like this. It's like a bunch of baby comets or something.

I wish I still had a photo of another piece she made of a reclining pig with pearl necklace. Basically, it was a parody of the reclining nude portraits so many artists seem compelled to paint. Sadly, Plainbellied traded it for a nice set of a salad bowl and cups made by a friend (sad that we don't have her piece, the bowl and cups are very nice).

New Music

2007-04-09T23:55:00.000-05:00

Today I purchased two new CDs: "Fly by Night" by Rush and "At Budokan" by Cheap Trick. I'm very happy with them. "Fly by Night" was the first Rush album to feature Neil Peart on drums (John Rutsey, their original drummer, refused to tour). Apart from the fact that he's an amazing drummer, he pushed the band into much more interesting musical directions. They started using 5- and 7-beat patterns and longer melodic arcs. While there are still weak spots on this album, it has "Anthem" and "Fly by Night" on it, and both are great tracks. They've got a new album coming out soon, and the one track I've heard from it gives me hope that it will be good. Plainbellied has agreed to go with me to see them live this summer. It will be a major milestone in her life, as she's never been to a rock concert before. This is a pretty good place to start, since Rush has been around for 33 years and has an older following. It will be much mellower than when I went to the Lollapalooza tour in 1993 and Ministry threatened to stop playing because people were throwing sod patches onto the stage. I was on the lawn, and people started ripping the wood fence apart and lighting bonfires. The next year, the venue (Great Woods in Mansfield, MA--now the Tweeter Center), banned the tour.

As I write this, I'm listening to Cheap Trick, and the lead singer just announced that "This next one is the first song on our new AL-bum. It just came out this week, and the song is called 'Surrender.'" Classic. We used to listen to this all the time when I was a kid. Unfortunately, the remastered version has lost a lot of character and made the vocals difficult to distinguish. I'm a bit disappointed. This live album, recorded in Japan, actually pushed the band into popularity. I think that's pretty cool.

Campout!!!!

2007-04-09T02:05:00.000-05:00

Well, we finally took Her Nibs camping. It was really fun. We did foil packs for dinner and roasted marshmallows for dessert s'mores. In the morning, our friends made us breakfast, and we all scarfed down eggs, bacon, and pancakes. As if that wasn't enough, then we had a barbecue and an Easter egg hunt for the young 'uns. Her Nibs got 10 candy-filled eggs and had a blast doing it.

There were only two minor glitches: it got down into the 30s at night, and the ground we slept on felt like concrete. The temperature wasn't a problem except that the county has a burn ban on now because of dry conditions, so we could only light charcoal, which isn't as fun as a full-on fire. And the ground wouldn't have been a problem if we owned an air mattress. We don't, so Plainbellied and I both woke up with sore backs. I also have a cut on my knuckle that I don't remember getting. Overall, though it was a great trial campout. I think we're going to try the beach soon.

I'm sure Plainbellied will have more to say on her blog.

On Greg Oden, Billy Packer, and the Florida Gators

2007-04-03T23:20:00.000-05:00

If you aren't really interested in sports, go ahead and skip to the last paragraph. One of my brothers took issue with my comments about Greg Oden and Billy Packer. He wrote:

I do not agree with your assessments of Greg Oden and Billy Packer. Oden is the next dominant NBA center, and if anything, opponents seem to get away with fouling him quite often. As for Packer, my take is that OSU was making a little bit of a run at that point, and it might have been a good idea for Florida to call time out and get everybody calmed down, remind them that they're the favorite, and then send them back out there.

I totally agree that Oden might be the next big thing in the NBA (I'm hedging my bets because I'm a wimp). My point in the previous post was that in last night's game, I think Oden got away with a lot. I don't think the refs called too many fouls on Florida. I just think that if they were going to call it tight against Florida, they should use the same standard on Oden. Apart from that, Oden was a monster last night. If the other members of his team had played like he did, I have no doubt that they could have won the game. Fortunately for those of us in the Gator Nation (I know, it sounds stupid), they didn't, and Florida won. As for Packer, my point was that I think he was over-dramatizing what was happening. Yes, OSU put together a decent little run, but I don't think it was time for Florida to panic.

As for Florida's team, I have to admit I'm a little sick of Joakim Noah. It was kind of fun to hear him talk last year, and I think he's a great player, but lately he's been getting under my skin. Living in the Sunshine State we get a lot of coverage, and I really wish he sounded more educated. I do like Al Horford and some of the other players though. I wish them luck in the NBA, since there is no way that they are going back to college now. Next year will be a down year for the Gators, since the football team was decimated after last season, and now the basketball team will have to regroup. Maybe they'll make another run on a couple of titles again in a few years (if Billy Donovan stays).

Anyway, this is the last you'll hear about this topic, and I probably won't be back to sports for a while. I tend to watch sports only when I'm rooting for a team in the playoffs, so you might hear more if the Red Sox make a run on the playoffs.

The Surreal Life

2007-04-02T23:46:00.000-05:00

Tonight we watched part of 'Dancing with the Stars.' Mostly, I wanted to see Heather Mills dance with her prosthetic leg. It seems unreal that she can do that. Well, the game started before she came on, so we missed it. Her Nibs had a great time, so we let her stay up late to watch until 9:00.

Well, as we were watching, I felt as though I was having an out of body experience when Cliff Claven started dancing the tango. I couldn't help myself, and I burst out laughing. I like John Ratzenberger, but he's still Cliff to me. Later, one of the guys from Nsync danced a tango to the 'Star Wars' theme. What a dork. I don't know if I can ever take that show seriously again.

I also have to say that Billy Packer, who is one of the NCAA championship announcers, needs to work on his delivery. By all accounts, Florida was the favorite to win (if you're not a Gator, you're Gator Bait!). At one point of the game, they went up 12 points. After a few plays, Ohio State cut the lead to 8, and Packer says, "The Gators are really in trouble here. They need to call a timeout." He was trying to inject a little drama into what was getting to look like a done deal, but he really needed to try harder than that. I forgot that teams had to win by at least 8 for it to count, I guess.

Also, I think there might have been some sort of payola going on, because the referees seemed incapable of calling fouls on Greg Oden. He should have fouled out early in the second half, but he lasted the whole game. Maybe they were trying to keep it a close game. But as they say, it's now water under the bridge.

Time Killer

2007-04-02T01:37:00.000-05:00

Right now I should be hard at work revising my introduction, but I'd rather write a blog entry. Perhaps I should write about sports? I haven't really touched on that before.

Living in Florida, I am currently enthralled by the University of Florida men's basketball team in the NCAA tournament. I like sports, but I don't usually watch them on television unless a team I like is in the playoffs (college football is a bit different, because 'every game is a playoff'). Well, now the Gators have a chance at winning back-to-back national championships, and to be the first school ever to be basketball and football champions in the same year. The ironic part? For that to happen, they have to beat the same team the football team steamrolled in January. Boy, a lot could really go wrong here. . . .

Actually, I have a real problem with the way college sports are now. People talk about how much money sports programs bring to universities, but that is only true in a handful of cases. Usually, the best they do is pay for the other sports teams, bringing little or no benefit to academic programs. I'm in favor of college sports, but I think people have forgotten the point. It used to be that an athletic scholarship was an opportunity to get an education. Now education has nothing to do with it. This is especially true here in Florida, where big-time college sports (FSU, UF, and Miami) seems more important to people than fixing our public school system (I said seems for a reason--I know people care about the school problems). I'm not sure there is a way to fix things, but surely someone much smarter than me has some ideas?

Anyway, I've said my piece. I need to get back to work. Go Gators!

Am I an April Fool?

2007-04-01T17:05:00.000-05:00

Today is April Fool's Day. In Spain, the equivalent day is December 28, the 'Día de los Inocentes.' Instead of pranks, people pull 'inocentadas.' My favorite story comes from the 1930s, when a newspaper reported that a particular politician had changed party, even though he hadn't. It took about a week for them to sort things out. Someday I'll think of a great prank, and someone is really going to get it.

Here at our house, we simply had fun painting nails today. These are the lengths to which a father will go to please his favorite (read: only) daughter. Her Nibs really wanted me to color my nails, too, so I agreed to let Plainbellied paint my toes. Well, as you can see from the picture, my hands ended up being included, too. Her Nibs picked all of the colors. Does that make me an April fool?

Her Nibs

Twilight Samurai

2007-04-01T04:24:00.000-05:00

I just finished watching a wonderful movie, and I have to write about it. The film, 'Twilight Samurai,' follows the experiences of a low-level samurai who is a widower with two young daughters and a senile mother. I won't give away the details, but the plot revolves around how he gets another chance with the girl he has always loved, but complications arise. His clan becomes involved in a leadership conflict, and he is ordered to fulfill a dangerous and morally suspect task. The film, released in 2003, is very different from most samurai movies because it isn't about fighting. And rather than express a reverence for bushido, it portrays a man who puts his family above honor.*

There are two main things that make 'Twilight Samurai' so good. First, the romantic relationship 'feels right.' One can recognize the feelings that Seibei and Tomoe have for one another without any sappy melodrama. Second, the tension that builds throughout the film is excruciating. Only a few movies draw me in like this (once Plainbellied came home while I was screaming at Alec Guinness in 'The Bridge on the River Kwai'). While I kept my composure tonight, I felt nervous and genuinely 'pulled' for Seibei to come out on top.

The only thing I would say detracts from this film is a weak epilogue. Other than that, it is a fabulous film with great acting and a compelling story.

* Bushido is the samurai code of honor. When I say that Seibei put his family above honor, I'm speaking specifically about this exaggerated code to which samurai adhered. I would definitely call him an honorable man by today's standards.

Her Nibs Week Continues

2007-03-31T01:16:00.000-05:00

Her Nibs has been on a roll this week, so I have to tell another story about her. Tonight, we decided to try a new restaurant nearby. We tend to have dinner relatively early (it's an easier schedule for getting Her Nibs to bed), so we got there around 5:30. After we got settled and ordered our food, an older couple approached us and said, "We'd like to compliment you on your child. She has been so well behaved this whole time. We usually go out to dinner early to avoid the family crowd, but your daughter has been wonderful." After a few moments of trying to get Her Nibs to say hello, they left.

I have to say that I was awestruck by their comments. I'm not writing this to brag about my daughter (though she is wonderful!). In fact, my initial reply was almost, "Just wait around a few minutes, and you'll see what she's capable of." Instead, we simply said thank you and left it at that. It was nice of them to say something, though. Often, we only hear about our kids when they are acting up.

Which leads me to my next anecdote. On the way home, Her Nibs was cranky, and she wanted us to change the song on the CD. I told her, "It's not all about you." Her response? "But it is all about me." Imagine that in a two-year-old's halting voice. All I could do was laugh, which caught her off guard, effectively ending the tantrum.

By the way, Her Nibs is usually an incredibly sweet little girl. The credit for that goes to Plainbellied, who is an incredibly sweet and affectionate mother. I think the patience she learned from dealing with me has paid dividends. :-)

Is the Bed Really That Uncomfortable?

2007-03-29T22:04:00.000-05:00

Her Nibs has had a hard time going to bed lately. She has given us grief for the past week or so, and a couple of times it has taken her several hours to go to sleep. In response, we would take the time to put her back in bed, with accompanying timeouts to make the idea stick that she needed to stay in bed. We really only do anything when she comes downstairs. Our guiding principle is that if she's upstairs and quiet, things are all right.

Well, she has changed her habits over the past two nights. Last night, when we went upstairs she was sprawled in the hallway—asleep. She had brought out her pillow and blanket, plus her stuffed pig and water-filled sippy cup. Tonight she did the same thing. It was so adorable, but it's a little disconcerting. We might have to do something about it eventually. But for now, we're just glad she's going to sleep.

One more anecdote: the other day, Her Nibs turned to me and said, "Daddy, you're my best friend ever." It was one of those moments fathers live for.

Two Important Lessons

2007-03-28T22:21:00.000-05:00

I learned an important lesson tonight: trust my instincts. Several years ago I tried to watch "Taxi Driver," but I stopped about halfway in because it was boring and offensive. Recently, I had heard good things about it, so I watched it again. Long story short, I was right the first time. Here's my verdict on the film. It's frickin' weird. The only redeeming value is the "Are you talkin' to me?" scene in front of the mirror.

Second lesson: never watch Martin Scorsese films (with the exception of the Bob Dylan documentary). Basically, his M.O. is to make movies that shock people. I remember liking "Goodfellas" when I saw it many years ago, but I have a feeling I wouldn't like it again. I don't think I'll ever see "The Departed." I mean, putting Scorsese and Leonardo DiCaprio together was a good idea because . . .

Martin Scorsese, you are now officially dead to me.

CLARIFICATION

Upon further reflection, I've decided that Scorsese is not completely dead to me. I had forgotten that he did Kundun and Raging Bull (as well as the Dylan documentary), so he is capable of making good films. He does, however, have a group of films that trouble me, including Taxi Driver, Casino, and The Departed, not to mention the fact that he seems to enjoy working with Leonardo DeCaprio (Gangs of New York, The Aviator, and The Departed). Taken as a whole, I don't think I like his work, but I should recognize here that there are some good films in there, too.

Talk to the Beard

2007-03-28T04:31:00.000-05:00

As I mentioned a couple of days ago, I'm going to be teaching a couple of courses this summer at my alma mater. Well, I just realized the other day that this means I have to shave off my beard. You see, the school has a very strict "dress and grooming" standard. No short shorts or facial hair (for men or women). It's actually a very sad realization for me. I've had the beard for a year and a half. I started it when I broke my hand in an embarrassing incident involving a refrigerator and cupboard. I had a cast on my right hand, and my left is essentially useless for intricate tasks, so I stopped shaving. By the time the cast came off, I had a decent beard going, so I kept it. Well, now it's going to come off.

I suppose I could argue about it or get on my high horse and not take the job, but let's face it, taking the classes is a good career move (and good summer money), and if the only thing I have to sacrifice is my beard, I'll do it. I mean, I did it for the three years I was in college. I can always start growing it back on August 16.

I'm a little embarassed, but. . .

2007-03-28T04:23:00.000-05:00

Tonight Plainbellied had soccer practice, so I was in charge of Her Nibs. Well, after dinner, we decided to watch a little television. The next thing I knew, I was waking up on the couch as Plainbellied came home. I had been asleep for at least half an hour, and I desperately hope that Her Nibs didn't get into any trouble. The killer is that even when Plainbellied came home, I went back to sleep, and by the time I got up, she was in bed, so I couldn't ask her about it.

Just so nobody thinks I'm lazy, I should explain. Because I'm trying to finish my dissertation right now, I spend my nights editing and my days sleeping (working at night eliminates distractions and makes me much more effective). Since I teach on Tuesday and Thursday, my sleep schedule gets screwed up, and I have to take evening naps before I get to work. Normally I would have waited until after Plainbellied came home, though. I should ask her what happened when she wakes up.

Suddenly, the Blogosphere Feels Crowded

2007-03-26T14:50:00.000-05:00

I thought I would mention a few blogs that I've just added to my "Nice Blogs" list. My brother and his wife have just initiated their own blog, called "conmigo-contigo." Currently, they are in Colombia, where my brother works for the US Foreign Service. They are much more witty and urbane than I am, so I hope you enjoy reading about their exploits. One thing you might notice when you read their blog is that I gave some misinformation about them recently. It turns out that my brother didn't meet the President, but his wife and kids did. I never fixed my blog, though, because I was too lazy. I never figured anyone would notice.

I put "Indigenous Beliefs" on my list as well. I announced not too long ago that this blog would be discontinued, but it turns out that it just took a hiatus (blogging can be exhausting, don'cha know). Well, it's back. I especially like the current post on Netflix and Blockbuster. We do Netflix right now and have considered switching, but maybe we'll stick with what we have.

I also finally added "Rhonda's Blog" to my list. Rhonda is one of our blog buddies from the Great White North. I always like reading her comments.

What's Next? Dunkin Donut Brakes?

2007-03-24T04:05:00.000-05:00

I took my car in for an oil change today, and I learned something new about it. Recently, our car developed a squeal in the brakes (it's a 2006 Toyota Matrix), I asked the mechanic to look at it today when I took it in. He told me that the brakes were "glazed." This meant that the rotor had been worn smooth when it should be rough. They outlined the procedure for fixing the issue, and it sounded wicked expensive to me. So I asked, in my inimitable way, "Is it a safety issue?" They said, "No. It's just a comfort issue." I think you know what I did. . . . I can live with the squeal.

Speaking of glazed, a new Dunkin' Donuts will soon open around the corner. I am partial to their donuts, and I don't like Krispy Kreme, which is all we can get here. I have fond memories of Dunkin' Donuts as a kid. My brothers and I all had paper routes as kids, and one of the best parts of it was being able to get donuts on the morning route. Early on, we went to a local bakery or Cumberland Farms (a convenience store) for donuts. Then they opened a Dunkin' Donuts in a nearby town, and we would drive all the way over there for donuts. They didn't open a shop in my hometown until just before I moved out of town for college. I don't tend to eat sweets, but I am very partial to Dunkin' Donuts and Ring Dings, neither of which is available where I live.

Isn't it just like them to open just before I (hopefully) move somewhere else? Jerks.

Odds and ends

2007-03-23T00:10:00.000-05:00

Here are a few random thoughts:

I've now watched two episodes of "Andy Barker, P.I.," and I think I like it. It's a quirky little detective show with a pudgy accountant playing the lead. "Raines," a new show with Jeff Goldblum, seems to hold promise, but I've had a hard time getting into the episodes. I may give it one more chance and then bail.

We're going camping in a few weeks, and I'm pretty excited. We are slowly picking up the supplies we need. Next up is a tent. The only thing that scares me is that the place we are going to camp has alligators. I hope they stay near the water.

This summer, we're heading out west for two months. My alma mater asked me to teach two summer courses. The money is good, so we're going.

I recently discovered the Cuban sub (sandwich). I like it.

Her Nibs is teaching me that a 2-year-old has a hard time distinguishing between "want" and "need." She also tends to answer questions like, "Why did you do that?" with "Because I did."

The longer I drink diet soda, the less disgusting it tastes.

Would Tylenol Help?

2007-03-22T02:05:00.000-05:00

I read a CNN.com article about Al Gore testifying before Congress about climate change. He said that the earth has a fever. He went on to say, "If your baby has a fever, you go to the doctor. If the doctor says you need to intervene here, you don't say, 'Well, I read a science fiction novel that told me it's not a problem.' If the crib's on fire, you don't speculate that the baby is flame retardant. You take action." Well, I'm calling a foul on Mr. Gore for poor use of imagery.

As a parent, I have some experience with childrens' fevers. A slight fever requires no medical intervention. In fact, the fever is indicative of the body's healing response and is a sign that the body can protect itself. Only an obsessive parent would go to a doctor with a child running a fever of 99.6 or even 100 unless the child exhibited other symptoms. I am not trying to say anything about global warming. I just think Mr. Gore needs to think through his imagery more clearly. His statement about the earth having a fever, if taken to a logical conclusion, could be taken to mean that the earth is protecting itself from an infection and that we should leave it alone until it gets out of control (so far temperatures have only risen about 1 degree). Then we should throw some Tylenol on it until it cools down.

Even though I just called a foul on "You can call me" Al, I kind of hope he runs for president now. We might get more choice quotes about lockboxes and non-flame-retardant babies. That would be so AWESOME!!!! I can't wait.

Larry Bird video

2007-03-21T01:05:00.000-05:00

As a lifelong Celtics fan, I found this video really fascinating. It's a compilation of Larry Bird buzzer-beating shots. I hope you like it, too.

Extreme Makeover: Home Edition

2007-03-21T00:40:00.000-05:00

Plainbellied is a big fan of "Extreme Makeover: Home Edition." I used to like it, but now I think it's just sappy drivel that rots my brain. I bring this up because Plainbellied just got the first season on DVD from Netflix. I watched an episode with her, and I realized two things that have changed significantly. First, they no longer actually do a "makeover." Now they completely demolish the house and start from scratch. Second, they spend much more time talking about the family and less on the actual building of the house. While I do care about their stories, I'd rather see what they've done with the house.

I'm more of a "This Old House" kind of person. They take the time to make the house really shine, and they show you what they've done, in detail. Lots of the houses on "Extreme Makeover" are just not the sort of thing I would ever want. I prefer understated elegance to over-the-top extravagance. "Hometime" is another one that I kind of like. They sometimes take on smaller projects, and I really like to learn how to do things. Someday I'll have my own house, and I'm sure I'll want to do something to it.

Alligators and lions and bears, oh my!

2007-03-17T22:48:00.000-05:00

Here in Florida, we have a lot of very dangerous creatures. Probably the most dangerous is the alligator. A few years ago, we visited the local botanical gardens with my parents when they came to visit. At the gardens, there is a stream, and an alligator lived in the stream. It was very exciting for my parents to see it. Well, about a year later, it turns out that the gator attacked one of the workers. I think he ripped off the worker's arm, but I can't remember if the man lived (I'm a little hazy on the details).

Yet for some reason, we aren't content with the vicious animals we already have. We have to import more. A friend of ours worked at a theme park with animal attractions, and he gave us free passes. We asked for a "behind-the-scenes" tour, but that wasn't allowed. The reason? A keeper at another theme park had brought friends behind the scenes to see the lions. Well, she got careless and the animal ripped her arm off (I'm certain about this one). So those tours were banned from all of the parks.

It makes me wonder about our fascination with animals that would kill us if given the chance. Think about Grizzly Man. He went to live with Kodiak bears and they killed him and his girlfriend. Maybe it has something to do with a need to dominate the things we most fear. Who knows?

Actually, I think it would be fun to play with a grizzly bear. . . if I knew it wouldn't hurt me.